Wow. Just...wow.
I'm so sorry.
My father was not there as much as he should have been, but I have never really been that angry at him. I knew he loved me and I saw Mother's abuse of him (and sometimes he abused her, but she usually started it) and I understood why he wasn't at home much. I wasn't home much either once I could escape. I get it. We were the scapegoats. My father did take me to his store a lot, which I enjoyed. He had a pharmacy. He drove me places with my best friend before I could drive. He did not have a golden child, a lost child or a scape goat.
I did not idolize him. Like everyone, I saw his faults, as well as everyone else's including my own. But I loved him. And when my parents were fighting when I was a kid, secretly, in my head, I was cheering, "Go, Dad!!! Go, go, go!" (This is the truth).
Copa, again I am sorry your father was arrogant enough to think you could handle seeing him cheating. Ugh. We are all so lucky we did not catch our FOO's sick diseases.