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Daddy Issues (my own)
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 608798" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Don't stress yourself over it. Yes, he is your dad who hasn't been there, a lot like mine who hasn't been there. Yes, he loves you. So does mine. My kids see him rarely and he doesn't seem all that invested in them and they don't ask about him much. </p><p></p><p>If you feel he will hurt you, evaluate why you feel the need to engage him again. That he is your dad is not a good enough reason. That you love him could be. </p><p></p><p>There are plenty of parents who don't act like it and are not in their kid's lives and everyone survives. If you want to give him another chance, do it, but tell him how you feel. And stick to your own boundaries. The important people in your family in my opinion are you, your husband, and your two boys and they come first. At least, (I shouldn't have attached my own values to you) that is how I feel about my family. Any other relatives are secondary to my husband and kids.</p><p></p><p>I understand your longing for parental approval and love. We all have it. Some of us, due to horrible behavior on our parent's part, decide it's not worth the price and don't even want it anymore. But that does not seem to be where you are. </p><p></p><p>Good luck making a decision that is best for YOU (I am more worried about YOU than your dad) <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> You seem to have a good head on your shoulders!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 608798, member: 1550"] Don't stress yourself over it. Yes, he is your dad who hasn't been there, a lot like mine who hasn't been there. Yes, he loves you. So does mine. My kids see him rarely and he doesn't seem all that invested in them and they don't ask about him much. If you feel he will hurt you, evaluate why you feel the need to engage him again. That he is your dad is not a good enough reason. That you love him could be. There are plenty of parents who don't act like it and are not in their kid's lives and everyone survives. If you want to give him another chance, do it, but tell him how you feel. And stick to your own boundaries. The important people in your family in my opinion are you, your husband, and your two boys and they come first. At least, (I shouldn't have attached my own values to you) that is how I feel about my family. Any other relatives are secondary to my husband and kids. I understand your longing for parental approval and love. We all have it. Some of us, due to horrible behavior on our parent's part, decide it's not worth the price and don't even want it anymore. But that does not seem to be where you are. Good luck making a decision that is best for YOU (I am more worried about YOU than your dad) :) You seem to have a good head on your shoulders! [/QUOTE]
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