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Desperate Mom needing advise with adult daughter of 22 with Borderline (Borderline (BPD))
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember1" data-source="post: 749923" data-attributes="member: 23706"><p>I read a book called "Stop Walking on Eggshells" that I got off Amazon. I think my daughter is borderline too. She wont get diagnosed and uses pot as therapy. She wont use anything else. She is married to a loser and has my grandson who I fear will be in trouble. Not a good situation for him.</p><p></p><p>Now if this were me, and at one time this was me, I told Kay she can never live with us again. She had run off to marry and has never been allowed back. But to assauge our guilt, my husband and I paid for her homes and aparrtments because she would not work and her husband was and is not ambitious. I was afraid they would become homeless. It was my biggest fear.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry we paid for them. They are in their 30s and wont talk to us now. We are almost broke from paying for their lack of ambition and we no longer pay anything and they hate us. But they need to grow up, no matter where that takes them or if they will. If they need to be homeless, God will watch over them.</p><p></p><p>My grandson has many people willing to house him. My daughter and.Mr. Worthless have nobody left. They could become homeless. But my husband and I are in our 60s with illnesses. If Kay lived here, her attitude alone would kill us. And I have other kids who would be furious at her,and may cause added trouble with her. No more.</p><p></p><p>Borderline is horrible. I try to block out Kay's cutting and stealing and multiple serious car accidents and never taking blame. I had to decide, with my husband, to focus on our lives and give Kay to God for Him to care for. God is a comfort to us. I know not everyone believes but we do.</p><p></p><p>We are doing better now. Kay is not the focus of our lives for the first time ever. I read a book called The Gifts of Acceptance by Daniel A. Miller. I ordered this from Amazon too. I am a big reader. This book has changed the way I see every aspect of life. I carry it around in my car and purse and have the most helpful passages highlighted and bookmarked. I also find solace at church. Find what works for you. Find a place of peace and comfort. It may be smart to make your daughter leave. Yes, its hard . Unthinkable at first. Are you in therapy to help you cope?</p><p></p><p>Keep posting. I received much help here. Be well.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember1, post: 749923, member: 23706"] I read a book called "Stop Walking on Eggshells" that I got off Amazon. I think my daughter is borderline too. She wont get diagnosed and uses pot as therapy. She wont use anything else. She is married to a loser and has my grandson who I fear will be in trouble. Not a good situation for him. Now if this were me, and at one time this was me, I told Kay she can never live with us again. She had run off to marry and has never been allowed back. But to assauge our guilt, my husband and I paid for her homes and aparrtments because she would not work and her husband was and is not ambitious. I was afraid they would become homeless. It was my biggest fear. I am sorry we paid for them. They are in their 30s and wont talk to us now. We are almost broke from paying for their lack of ambition and we no longer pay anything and they hate us. But they need to grow up, no matter where that takes them or if they will. If they need to be homeless, God will watch over them. My grandson has many people willing to house him. My daughter and.Mr. Worthless have nobody left. They could become homeless. But my husband and I are in our 60s with illnesses. If Kay lived here, her attitude alone would kill us. And I have other kids who would be furious at her,and may cause added trouble with her. No more. Borderline is horrible. I try to block out Kay's cutting and stealing and multiple serious car accidents and never taking blame. I had to decide, with my husband, to focus on our lives and give Kay to God for Him to care for. God is a comfort to us. I know not everyone believes but we do. We are doing better now. Kay is not the focus of our lives for the first time ever. I read a book called The Gifts of Acceptance by Daniel A. Miller. I ordered this from Amazon too. I am a big reader. This book has changed the way I see every aspect of life. I carry it around in my car and purse and have the most helpful passages highlighted and bookmarked. I also find solace at church. Find what works for you. Find a place of peace and comfort. It may be smart to make your daughter leave. Yes, its hard . Unthinkable at first. Are you in therapy to help you cope? Keep posting. I received much help here. Be well. [/QUOTE]
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Desperate Mom needing advise with adult daughter of 22 with Borderline (Borderline (BPD))
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