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<blockquote data-quote="Heavyhearted" data-source="post: 712883" data-attributes="member: 21871"><p>Oh I know. The family therapist said that it is like they came from a different family ( my two older ones) I have thought a lot about how I am feeling and learning to let go. I realize now that I focused so much on my kids that I sort of lost myself in the process. </p><p></p><p>I've been a mom since 21 and my children were my life. I swore to give them all of me and make sure they knew they were loved. My first two are wired differently and I personalize their behavior</p><p></p><p>My 17yr old and 14 yr old are wise beyond their years and I know I will be OK. I am</p><p>Just battling against what motherhood is like after your adult child make choices that, because of past experience, are not well thought out. Usually when the older children make rash decision there is a crisis that follows... I have learned to be prepared for it and I am weary.</p><p></p><p>I don't want to enable but I'm not quite ready to remove the safety net. I come from a very close knit family. I talk to my mom and sisters everyday, we live close to each other and spend most holidays together. I was hoping this foundation would stick.</p><p></p><p>My older kids just don't respect anyone or anything and Ifeel broken. I have spent so much time and resources trying to figure this out, how does this happen. I have two children whose personalities hinder them from lasting relationships with others and themselves. Neither has a support system, nor any lasting friendships.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Heavyhearted, post: 712883, member: 21871"] Oh I know. The family therapist said that it is like they came from a different family ( my two older ones) I have thought a lot about how I am feeling and learning to let go. I realize now that I focused so much on my kids that I sort of lost myself in the process. I've been a mom since 21 and my children were my life. I swore to give them all of me and make sure they knew they were loved. My first two are wired differently and I personalize their behavior My 17yr old and 14 yr old are wise beyond their years and I know I will be OK. I am Just battling against what motherhood is like after your adult child make choices that, because of past experience, are not well thought out. Usually when the older children make rash decision there is a crisis that follows... I have learned to be prepared for it and I am weary. I don't want to enable but I'm not quite ready to remove the safety net. I come from a very close knit family. I talk to my mom and sisters everyday, we live close to each other and spend most holidays together. I was hoping this foundation would stick. My older kids just don't respect anyone or anything and Ifeel broken. I have spent so much time and resources trying to figure this out, how does this happen. I have two children whose personalities hinder them from lasting relationships with others and themselves. Neither has a support system, nor any lasting friendships. [/QUOTE]
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