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Did I over-react? Teen easy child issue
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 227155" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I think part of my unpopular reasoning is:</p><p>1/PCs are way different than difficult children. I've had both and something about difficult children just invites trouble.</p><p></p><p>2/At 17, this girl is going to have the opportunity to take drugs, drink, have sex, etc. in unsupervised places anyway. I would want her to know I appreciate her good choices. My difficult child daughter wasn't allowed to be at homes where parents weren't there, but that didn't stop her from drugging it up, climbing out of her window to hit the town at night, drinking, etc. At 15, yeah, I'd have dragged my kid home. But not at 17. They have to learn by then to say "no" even in the most tempting circumstances as they get ready to spread their wings. Temptation is everywhere. Parent supervision isn't possible at all times when kids are 17/18/up. I would figure that if I can't trust my 17 year old, she's in big trouble in a year because I can't make her come home then and I certainly can't control what she does when I don't see. difficult children tend to find ways to get into trouble even if we keep them under lock and key, even if it's punching holes in the wall and threatening to beat us up. PCs tend to think before they act. If this kid was going to suddenly try smoking pot, and she never did before, or have sex, and she never did before, it was going to happen anyway. And, most likely, she would not become a substance abuser or promiscuous. Our difficult child's tend to start acting out way before 17. And after 17, we can't control them at all anymore. Not that we ever really did! I'm thinking a well behaved 17 year old could start lying about where she is to have more freedom. It's typical teen stuff, just the age. JMO.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 227155, member: 1550"] I think part of my unpopular reasoning is: 1/PCs are way different than difficult children. I've had both and something about difficult children just invites trouble. 2/At 17, this girl is going to have the opportunity to take drugs, drink, have sex, etc. in unsupervised places anyway. I would want her to know I appreciate her good choices. My difficult child daughter wasn't allowed to be at homes where parents weren't there, but that didn't stop her from drugging it up, climbing out of her window to hit the town at night, drinking, etc. At 15, yeah, I'd have dragged my kid home. But not at 17. They have to learn by then to say "no" even in the most tempting circumstances as they get ready to spread their wings. Temptation is everywhere. Parent supervision isn't possible at all times when kids are 17/18/up. I would figure that if I can't trust my 17 year old, she's in big trouble in a year because I can't make her come home then and I certainly can't control what she does when I don't see. difficult children tend to find ways to get into trouble even if we keep them under lock and key, even if it's punching holes in the wall and threatening to beat us up. PCs tend to think before they act. If this kid was going to suddenly try smoking pot, and she never did before, or have sex, and she never did before, it was going to happen anyway. And, most likely, she would not become a substance abuser or promiscuous. Our difficult child's tend to start acting out way before 17. And after 17, we can't control them at all anymore. Not that we ever really did! I'm thinking a well behaved 17 year old could start lying about where she is to have more freedom. It's typical teen stuff, just the age. JMO. [/QUOTE]
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Did I over-react? Teen easy child issue
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