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Parent Emeritus
difficult child and quitting her job - It was all a lie and I am boiling.
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<blockquote data-quote="witzend" data-source="post: 543248" data-attributes="member: 99"><p>Stay strong, Dash. You're right that she's not a roommate, <em>and</em> that she's not a child. You're right that she didn't "lose" her job, she quit it. In hindsight, letting her slide on rent because she blew her money on something else (tattoos, etc.) probably wasn't the best idea, and may have led to her thinking that no job was "ok". As they say, "A lesson lived is a lesson learned." That's <em>your</em> free pass.</p><p></p><p>I don't think I would give <em>any</em> nights away from home because she's too drunk to drive. If she were my roommate or daughter or spouse and drinking, she needs to be responsible enough to stop drinking early enough to drive home. Only a problem drinker can't do that. I suspect that your DEX is letting her drink (or worse) and that's why she's crashing with him on a regular basis. But, if there were "nights out", I'd probably ok two a night with her dad, so long as you and her dad can talk honestly with each other about concerns and that these talks don't turn into him tattling to her about your concerns. From the outsifde looking in, it seems that she comes to your house after days of partying to CRASH and get food and laundry because you don't offer her a high, and that's why she doesn't stay. I hope that before you talk to her that you will consider this point of view. </p><p></p><p>I think that deep down you know that she has to leave because she is not a part of your household, she's just abusing your good nature. The truth is that the only question is how bad are you going to let your relationship with her get before you ask her to leave?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="witzend, post: 543248, member: 99"] Stay strong, Dash. You're right that she's not a roommate, [I]and[/I] that she's not a child. You're right that she didn't "lose" her job, she quit it. In hindsight, letting her slide on rent because she blew her money on something else (tattoos, etc.) probably wasn't the best idea, and may have led to her thinking that no job was "ok". As they say, "A lesson lived is a lesson learned." That's [I]your[/I] free pass. I don't think I would give [I]any[/I] nights away from home because she's too drunk to drive. If she were my roommate or daughter or spouse and drinking, she needs to be responsible enough to stop drinking early enough to drive home. Only a problem drinker can't do that. I suspect that your DEX is letting her drink (or worse) and that's why she's crashing with him on a regular basis. But, if there were "nights out", I'd probably ok two a night with her dad, so long as you and her dad can talk honestly with each other about concerns and that these talks don't turn into him tattling to her about your concerns. From the outsifde looking in, it seems that she comes to your house after days of partying to CRASH and get food and laundry because you don't offer her a high, and that's why she doesn't stay. I hope that before you talk to her that you will consider this point of view. I think that deep down you know that she has to leave because she is not a part of your household, she's just abusing your good nature. The truth is that the only question is how bad are you going to let your relationship with her get before you ask her to leave? [/QUOTE]
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difficult child and quitting her job - It was all a lie and I am boiling.
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