difficult child finally called

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by jbrain, May 2, 2009.

  1. jbrain

    jbrain Member

    Hi All,
    last night, just as husband and I were leaving Chili's, difficult child called. She sounded awful and in fact she was sick. She told me she has strep throat and an inflamed thyroid and she has been sick for about a month. She said she had prescriptions for Zithromax, prescription strength Ibuprofen and some other prescription for the thyroid. She had not filled them because she did not have the money. She said her friend who was letting her use the phone would lend her the $50.00 she thought she needed and wondered if she could borrow $50.00 from me to pay the friend.

    I told her I would send her $200.00 by wire and that she did not need to pay me back, to use any extra for food or diapers or whatever she needed most.

    I have never heard anyone so grateful in my entire life. She just broke down in tears and said she had not wanted to ask me for help and she knows how awful she was as a teen, she understands what she put me through now that she has her own child.

    She called me after she got the money and the medicines and was so relieved that she can maybe get well now. She said her throat hurts from her chest up to her neck and she can't move her head very well. She has trouble swallowing from the swollen thyroid. The baby is teething (he is 6 months old now) and very fussy. She said she is exhausted and it is hard to work and she isn't making much money at work because she doesn't have the energy and feels so crummy (she is an exotic dancer and has to be vivacious, friendly, all that stuff). She said she is out of breath after doing one dance.

    But, she is ecstatic to get the medicine and I told her she should call me if she needs refills or any time that she needs medication--she should not go without it.

    So, I am glad to hear from her but still worried about her. I hope the antibiotics kick in quickly and she can get back her health. She has always had health problems since she was a baby but she perseveres.

    In the past I might have wondered if she was making all this up just to get money but I don't think that now. She hasn't asked for money in over a year and she truly sounded sick.

    One thing--I have been doing EMDR therapy for awhile for anxiety and I could see results in talking with difficult child. I did not get that panicky, heart pounding feeling. I felt calm and able to think more clearly. I still feel worried about her but the anxiety just isn't really there.

    Thanks for listening!

  2. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    I'm glad she called and sorry to hear she's sick. I'm glad you sent the money---sounds like she was really grateful. Hopefully she is better soon.
  3. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    I'm glad she called. Sounds like the poor girl is very sick. Strep is nothing to mess with. Good for you for wiring her money to get her medications and help her a bit til she can get back up on her feet. That's not enabling.......that's helping, whole other ball of wax.

    Sounds like maturity might be creeping up on difficult child. (fingers crossed) I'll add difficult child to my prayers that she gets well soon.

  4. Im a Believer

    Im a Believer New Member

    Jane ~ I am glad she called you and glad things may be on the mend with your relationship ~ God Bless!
  5. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry to hear that she is not feeling well. On the other hand, it seems as though the relationship between the two of you is really improving. It's amazing what 3,000 miles or so will do, isn't it?
  6. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Also very glad that she called you and you were able to wire her the money for the medications. I hope the baby doesn't catch anything and that she gets well fast.

    It's wonderful that the EMDR was able to help you keep the severe anxiety at bay. Good for you!
  7. Jena

    Jena New Member


    I'm glad she called and she was sincere and you felt that, that's huge. I"m glad you were able to be there for her and i hope she is on the mend, it's hard caring for a baby and being sick at the same time.

    I'm glad to hear the edmr is working so well for you, that's great. I"m also setting up an appointment. for that.

    it's so hard, even when their adults you still worry just as much i'm so glad you didnt' have that heart beating through chest feeling, i've been there it's not a good time lol
  8. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    I'm glad that she called. Her relationship with you really seems to be maturing.

    Sending healing thoughts out to difficult child. It's awful to be so sick and trying to take care of a little one. I'm glad you were able to help her.

  9. ML

    ML Guest

    This is so encouraging! I'll have to check into that EMDR thing :)
  10. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    WOW! What a great Mom you are - (and a SUPER grandma)

    It was great to see such a happy post and a happy YOU!!!!!

    CONGRATS Mom - this is a huge milestone for all!
  11. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    Jane, as you know, there isn't any one of us who wouldn't cut off our right arm for our kids and there are so few of us who hear any kind of appreciation for that kind of generosity. I am just thrilled that you that you did. It's positively wonderful.