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difficult child has been suspended from college
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 317272"><p>Nancy,</p><p>Was thinking about you this morning and came here.</p><p>I'm so sorry the stress continues....</p><p>I'm sorry to say our daughter had some even rougher moments after high school and perhaps similar to your thoughts...this is what I expected would be the case.</p><p>We gave her opportunities for growth, but she did not take them and made many, many mistakes. It was horrible for my mommy heart and husband had to take over.</p><p>Very recently (knock on wood), I have noticed some improvements on her part. True, it is not ideal, but there are noticeable changes. She is working with a social worker and she commented the other day that in the last 2 months, the changes are more concrete. I suppose over the last year, there were tiny baby steps, but this was a more noticeable one. It's hard to fully explain, but I think you understand.</p><p>I am working in an addiction treatment place ( we provide a variety of counseling, but working with DUI is the main work we do) and there are many young people. Some are older and out of the ones who are not (younger than 25), many of those started when they were young.</p><p>It is noticeable to me that the ones who show the most promise, are the ones who go to AA regularly and who have formed a camaraderie there. One thing that is a little "tricky" is finding a location when the person is young....sometimes they want to find a place with many other young people, but the truth is they learn the most from a mix and learn much from folks older than themselves.</p><p>Sometimes I think they get just as much out of AA as expensive treatments, although some really totally need both and have done extremely well doing this. </p><p>We have one young man, who had a very tumultuous past, I mean really really bad, including long jail time.... for drinking, driving and narcotics.</p><p>He went to various programs, but loves his AA and NA.</p><p>He is out our place for a former conviction...cleaning up his past. He has been sober (abstinent) for over a year. </p><p>Today, he has a job making $100,000 a year and is seriously considering going back to college (has a plan) and entering a very difficult and prestigious career. It is totally impressive and he credits it all to working the AA and NA programs (he goes as often as possible).</p><p>Again, I'm so sorry for you, your husband and also for your difficult child. I hope and pray for your wisdom, peace and sanity. PLEASE go to extreme self nurturing. Please know that myself as well as others really care. (hugs).</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 317272"] Nancy, Was thinking about you this morning and came here. I'm so sorry the stress continues.... I'm sorry to say our daughter had some even rougher moments after high school and perhaps similar to your thoughts...this is what I expected would be the case. We gave her opportunities for growth, but she did not take them and made many, many mistakes. It was horrible for my mommy heart and husband had to take over. Very recently (knock on wood), I have noticed some improvements on her part. True, it is not ideal, but there are noticeable changes. She is working with a social worker and she commented the other day that in the last 2 months, the changes are more concrete. I suppose over the last year, there were tiny baby steps, but this was a more noticeable one. It's hard to fully explain, but I think you understand. I am working in an addiction treatment place ( we provide a variety of counseling, but working with DUI is the main work we do) and there are many young people. Some are older and out of the ones who are not (younger than 25), many of those started when they were young. It is noticeable to me that the ones who show the most promise, are the ones who go to AA regularly and who have formed a camaraderie there. One thing that is a little "tricky" is finding a location when the person is young....sometimes they want to find a place with many other young people, but the truth is they learn the most from a mix and learn much from folks older than themselves. Sometimes I think they get just as much out of AA as expensive treatments, although some really totally need both and have done extremely well doing this. We have one young man, who had a very tumultuous past, I mean really really bad, including long jail time.... for drinking, driving and narcotics. He went to various programs, but loves his AA and NA. He is out our place for a former conviction...cleaning up his past. He has been sober (abstinent) for over a year. Today, he has a job making $100,000 a year and is seriously considering going back to college (has a plan) and entering a very difficult and prestigious career. It is totally impressive and he credits it all to working the AA and NA programs (he goes as often as possible). Again, I'm so sorry for you, your husband and also for your difficult child. I hope and pray for your wisdom, peace and sanity. PLEASE go to extreme self nurturing. Please know that myself as well as others really care. (hugs). [/QUOTE]
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