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Parent Emeritus
difficult child is back in jail....and God it is depressing
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<blockquote data-quote="Albatross" data-source="post: 621643" data-attributes="member: 17720"><p>Hi HHE. I'm so glad you are feeling better. Like Echo said, I don't know your son and you would know manipulation better than any of us. To my read, it is not. He is taking responsibility, accepting the consequences, and thinking about the future. Those are all good things, adult things, to do. And I agree with the others, from what I read here he sounds like a good kid with a substance use issue. The only thing that struck me as manipulative was his signature line. You kinda knew he was your son, didn't need to be reminded of that...! Your not going to the hearing is a very impactful (is that a word?) statement to him. Is that where you want to be at this stage in your relationship? If it were me (and it's not) I would probably withdraw him from classes as he asked because it sounds like he's at least thinking about one day going back to college and I would want to encourage his keeping that option open. The lawyer, I'm kind of on the fence about. He is an adult, she is representing him (not you), and your involvement really isn't necessary for her to do her job. But as others said earlier, I guess that all depends. If she seemed incompetent or blase', I would probably want to be involved at least to the level of giving her the fish eye. If there was a long history of repeat offenses, your son was older, etc. my opinion would change.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Albatross, post: 621643, member: 17720"] Hi HHE. I'm so glad you are feeling better. Like Echo said, I don't know your son and you would know manipulation better than any of us. To my read, it is not. He is taking responsibility, accepting the consequences, and thinking about the future. Those are all good things, adult things, to do. And I agree with the others, from what I read here he sounds like a good kid with a substance use issue. The only thing that struck me as manipulative was his signature line. You kinda knew he was your son, didn't need to be reminded of that...! Your not going to the hearing is a very impactful (is that a word?) statement to him. Is that where you want to be at this stage in your relationship? If it were me (and it's not) I would probably withdraw him from classes as he asked because it sounds like he's at least thinking about one day going back to college and I would want to encourage his keeping that option open. The lawyer, I'm kind of on the fence about. He is an adult, she is representing him (not you), and your involvement really isn't necessary for her to do her job. But as others said earlier, I guess that all depends. If she seemed incompetent or blase', I would probably want to be involved at least to the level of giving her the fish eye. If there was a long history of repeat offenses, your son was older, etc. my opinion would change. [/QUOTE]
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difficult child is back in jail....and God it is depressing
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