Yep, I have the same sort of stuff in my family of origin. My one biological son got a chunk of it and we then decided to adopt our other kids. And bio. son is 36 and still has the issues we passed along genetically. However I really think he would have been worse if he had lived in a crazy enviornment so he was spared a little.
Your son is too young for any diagnosis of a personality disorder. I'd just take him for help ad do what I could. One day at a time...one moment at a time...unfortunately, it isn't true that all kids respond to consistent consequences, but it can't hurt.Do your best and try not to worry too far into the future. Hugs!!!! 
