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difficult child needs therapy but refuses, don't know how to approach it
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<blockquote data-quote="flutterby" data-source="post: 315654" data-attributes="member: 7083"><p>I lived the same thing with my daughter. Bottom line is if the child is not willing to participate, then it's a waste of your time and the therapists time.</p><p></p><p>You could try to continue to approach it - gently and you'll feel like a broken record - without really forcing the issue. She needs to feel like it's her choice/decision. Those with anxiety feel like they have very little control over their environment, so it's very important, in my humble opinion, for her to feel like this is something she has a choice in.</p><p></p><p>That doesn't mean you completely leave the issue alone. It's more a matter of timing. I don't know what your daughter does, but my daughter would have these marathon "angst sessions", as I called them, where she would go on for hours about how miserable she was. I would exhaust all of my knowledge and ability to help, and when that wasn't enough would broach the therapist subject. Like I said, broken record. The more it went on, the less help I offered because it was the same thing over and over again and she rejected it all. It was also incredibly frustrating and draining.</p><p></p><p>I didn't enjoy my child for a long, long time. It took a very long time, but she finally realized that therapy was the best option. Once she bought into it, she was completely into it. We still have a long way to go, but I actually have a lot of moments where I enjoy my daughter again.</p><p></p><p>It was an incredibly long process and I wish I had found a better way to circumvent it. For my daughter, this is what it took. She had to buy into therapy or it would be a waste of time. And we had already wasted years on therapy she wasn't really participating in and wasn't buying into at all. in my opinion, if you force a child into therapy who isn't willing, you're setting up a situation where the child where dig in her heels and may never be willing to try therapy again.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there. It's a long road. And make sure to carve out time for yourself.</p><p></p><p>(((hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="flutterby, post: 315654, member: 7083"] I lived the same thing with my daughter. Bottom line is if the child is not willing to participate, then it's a waste of your time and the therapists time. You could try to continue to approach it - gently and you'll feel like a broken record - without really forcing the issue. She needs to feel like it's her choice/decision. Those with anxiety feel like they have very little control over their environment, so it's very important, in my humble opinion, for her to feel like this is something she has a choice in. That doesn't mean you completely leave the issue alone. It's more a matter of timing. I don't know what your daughter does, but my daughter would have these marathon "angst sessions", as I called them, where she would go on for hours about how miserable she was. I would exhaust all of my knowledge and ability to help, and when that wasn't enough would broach the therapist subject. Like I said, broken record. The more it went on, the less help I offered because it was the same thing over and over again and she rejected it all. It was also incredibly frustrating and draining. I didn't enjoy my child for a long, long time. It took a very long time, but she finally realized that therapy was the best option. Once she bought into it, she was completely into it. We still have a long way to go, but I actually have a lot of moments where I enjoy my daughter again. It was an incredibly long process and I wish I had found a better way to circumvent it. For my daughter, this is what it took. She had to buy into therapy or it would be a waste of time. And we had already wasted years on therapy she wasn't really participating in and wasn't buying into at all. in my opinion, if you force a child into therapy who isn't willing, you're setting up a situation where the child where dig in her heels and may never be willing to try therapy again. Hang in there. It's a long road. And make sure to carve out time for yourself. (((hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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difficult child needs therapy but refuses, don't know how to approach it
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