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difficult child "thing" or adoption "thing" or both
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<blockquote data-quote="TheyAreLegallyAdultsNow" data-source="post: 346198" data-attributes="member: 8405"><p>Empathetic hugs Nomad!!!!!!!!!</p><p></p><p>You raise a valid question... adoption is not <u>to blame</u> for the situation at all, but it can be a "common thread" regarding the behaviors and attitudes that concern you. </p><p></p><p>The behaviors you describe could possibly be linked to symptoms of an attachment disorder... and attachment disorders are more common among people who have been adopted. </p><p></p><p>There are adopted people without attachment disorders. </p><p></p><p>Those behaviors can also be as the other awesome parents have described as "poor boundaries" and "immaturity." </p><p></p><p>Sadly, the scenario you describe is very familiar to me. </p><p></p><p>Our difficult child-daughter was diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder just after we finalized adoption. She exhibits the same kinds of very concerning behavior. Those behaviors are included in a long list of symptoms for her mental illness. </p><p></p><p>It has been explained to us that the "cause and effect thinking" part of her brain was damaged because she was drug/alcohol exposed in-utero and she didn't have the opportunity to properly bond with a caregiver that continuously cared for her. </p><p></p><p>It was concerning when our difficult child-daughter would walk off with complete strangers at playgrounds as a 7 year old. </p><p></p><p>It is concerning that as a 21 year old she gets herself in equally as dangerous situations. Unfortunately at 21 she is no longer closely supervised by someone to "bring her back" from the dangerous situations she creates herself or walks willingly into. </p><p></p><p>Hang in there!!!!!</p><p></p><p><3</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TheyAreLegallyAdultsNow, post: 346198, member: 8405"] Empathetic hugs Nomad!!!!!!!!! You raise a valid question... adoption is not [U]to blame[/U] for the situation at all, but it can be a "common thread" regarding the behaviors and attitudes that concern you. The behaviors you describe could possibly be linked to symptoms of an attachment disorder... and attachment disorders are more common among people who have been adopted. There are adopted people without attachment disorders. Those behaviors can also be as the other awesome parents have described as "poor boundaries" and "immaturity." Sadly, the scenario you describe is very familiar to me. Our difficult child-daughter was diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder just after we finalized adoption. She exhibits the same kinds of very concerning behavior. Those behaviors are included in a long list of symptoms for her mental illness. It has been explained to us that the "cause and effect thinking" part of her brain was damaged because she was drug/alcohol exposed in-utero and she didn't have the opportunity to properly bond with a caregiver that continuously cared for her. It was concerning when our difficult child-daughter would walk off with complete strangers at playgrounds as a 7 year old. It is concerning that as a 21 year old she gets herself in equally as dangerous situations. Unfortunately at 21 she is no longer closely supervised by someone to "bring her back" from the dangerous situations she creates herself or walks willingly into. Hang in there!!!!! <3 [/QUOTE]
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