difficult child's aide is moving

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by tictoc, Jan 29, 2010.

  1. tictoc

    tictoc New Member

    I am so upset...difficult child's wonderful 1:1 aide is moving out of state in about 3 weeks. :sad-very: She has been so good with him. She is a very talented, compassionate person and she is someone I trust completely with difficult child. I have felt fortunate that she is the person I leave him with every morning. But, she has to move for family reasons and won't be able to finish the year with him. I'm not sure what the school's plan is for replacing her. He has a good relationship with an aide from another classroom and there are 2 substitute aides who he likes, so I hope something suitable can be worked out.

    difficult child doesn't know yet that his aide is leaving. He will be very sad.

    I guess it is true that all good things must come to an end.
  2. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Aides gotta move... what a pity. I hope they give him a good hand over.

  3. whatamess

    whatamess New Member

    That is so hard. I hope they find someone as caring to take her place. When will you tell difficult child?
  4. ML

    ML Guest

    I hope he gets a new one he likes just as much and that she will help him develop and grow in directions the old one may not have. We learn different things from different people so this could wind up being a good thing in the end. Though very sad for the short term and I'm sorry for his disappointment. Hugs, ML
  5. helpme

    helpme New Member

    I too understand what you are going through.
    Good teachers and aides make a tremendous
    difference in many children s lives. I wish you
    luck and your difficult child the best during this difficult
  6. tictoc

    tictoc New Member

    Thanks for your kind thoughts. I'm going to talk to the inclusion specialist on Monday to see what the plan is. Our neuropsychologist (in an oddly prescient moment a couple of months ago) recommended having the aide make a video to train difficult child's next aide. I am going to ask that the aide either do that or take some time to write out some of her strategies for working with difficult child. The aide has been doing 20 to 30 minutes of exercises with difficult child in the adaptive PE room before class every morning, so we'll need her to leave some of those ideas behind, too.

    I guess we'll tell difficult child soon. I would prefer to know who the replacement aide will be before we tell him, but that depends on the SD finding someone quickly.
  7. svengandhi

    svengandhi Well-Known Member

    Perhaps the aide who is leaving has an opinion about which, if any, of the other aides might be able to work with difficult child without upsetting the children they are currently with. You could also ask the aide if she knows anyone who might be interested in applying for the job. Since she knows him and has done so well with him, her insights could be very helpful.

    My son has had the same aide for 3 years. She even left the teacher she had worked with for years (he would loop back and forth between grades 3 and 4 and she would go with him) to move up to 5th this year with my son. However, he is graduating and moving on to middle school this year. My son does not want to have an aide any more at the middle school so I am planning to have her at his transition meeting to give insight into what methods work with my son when he gets in a mood.

    Good luck.
  8. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I sooooo understand. Our kids can definately form strong bonds with those who understand them and are seen as alies. If your son is anything like mine, he doesn't like change either. We lost difficult child's first wonderful 1:1 after one year - it was really tough. The next one was basically a joke, but he's had his current 1:1 for three years and he's the best by far. You just never know....

    I've always had difficult child meet the 1:1 outside of the actual school day before starting.

    I hope difficult child gets another aide that is just as caring and supportive as the one he is loosing. Give it some time....