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Dim-whit -adopted daughters bio Mom just called me -
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 433423" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>WOW. I thought I was the only one who knew people like that. you are largely describing my mother and father's best friend - who is on her ninth marriage to seven men. The guy who was her fourth husband is also her 9th husband, and the 7th and 8th marriages were to the same guy - who she had known as a family friend for twenty plus years but during the first marriage (her 7th) someone at a union meeting slipped something into his beer that permanently changed his brain chemistry. Marrying him the second time (8th marriage) was so that he wouldn't kill her and because he needed help with the doctor stuff because he couldn't understand it. The current husband is the ONLY one of the men that was decent - the others were fixer-uppers because that was all she thought she deserved (childhood of abuse of all kinds will do that, first husband was when seh was 15 and he left her with lifelong scars and badly healed fractured bones - I remember when I was seven she had to get her nose rebroken and surgically repaired because damage, then when I was in college she could finally afford to have her jaw rebroken and fixed from damage that guy did long before i was even born!). With all but this man she divorced them as soon as they were fixed up. Well, the 7th/8th guy wasn't better but was going to kill her and she had to leave with-o most of her stuff or die.</p><p></p><p>Anyway, this woman has a big heart and makes good friends even on an airplane - with people she will call and write to for years, and they call and write back. But I stopped talking toher when I realized that unless I had serious drama she wasn't ever going to return a call just to talk, and usually any drama I might call about couldn't be talked about because she had to tell me all about her son and grandkids drama and the girl down the street from where she lived twenty years ago that I met for twenty minutes one day's drama - and this can NEVER be talked about on her dime even when she has unlimited long distance or when it is a local call. I actually got her number when she couldn't visit us for the seven years we lived 70 min away from her -but she could drive to visit people who lived five minutes from us - and she had to drive past our home to get to them! As in right past our driveway kind of past our home.</p><p></p><p>So I totally get what you mean, her family is enmeshed like that. We are her "normal" friends - as in my parents are still married (first time for either of them), have only lived in three places in their married life (apartment, first home, current home), have steady jobs, etc... and the support always goes out to her, sometimes back to my mom, but never back to the rest of us in any real way. She also cannot keep a secret though she swears she is the keeper of everyone's secrets. I tested this a couple of times because my mom kept telling me that this aunt was upset because I didn't really "talk" to her anymore. So I told her some "secrets" that were not true and sure enough, she told not just my mom but also my gfgbro! And she embellished what I told her to the point of true crazy.</p><p></p><p>Stay a text only friend. You will never regret staying out of this drama. I PROMISE!!!</p><p></p><p>And Numby sure sounded like the right name when I posted it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 433423, member: 1233"] WOW. I thought I was the only one who knew people like that. you are largely describing my mother and father's best friend - who is on her ninth marriage to seven men. The guy who was her fourth husband is also her 9th husband, and the 7th and 8th marriages were to the same guy - who she had known as a family friend for twenty plus years but during the first marriage (her 7th) someone at a union meeting slipped something into his beer that permanently changed his brain chemistry. Marrying him the second time (8th marriage) was so that he wouldn't kill her and because he needed help with the doctor stuff because he couldn't understand it. The current husband is the ONLY one of the men that was decent - the others were fixer-uppers because that was all she thought she deserved (childhood of abuse of all kinds will do that, first husband was when seh was 15 and he left her with lifelong scars and badly healed fractured bones - I remember when I was seven she had to get her nose rebroken and surgically repaired because damage, then when I was in college she could finally afford to have her jaw rebroken and fixed from damage that guy did long before i was even born!). With all but this man she divorced them as soon as they were fixed up. Well, the 7th/8th guy wasn't better but was going to kill her and she had to leave with-o most of her stuff or die. Anyway, this woman has a big heart and makes good friends even on an airplane - with people she will call and write to for years, and they call and write back. But I stopped talking toher when I realized that unless I had serious drama she wasn't ever going to return a call just to talk, and usually any drama I might call about couldn't be talked about because she had to tell me all about her son and grandkids drama and the girl down the street from where she lived twenty years ago that I met for twenty minutes one day's drama - and this can NEVER be talked about on her dime even when she has unlimited long distance or when it is a local call. I actually got her number when she couldn't visit us for the seven years we lived 70 min away from her -but she could drive to visit people who lived five minutes from us - and she had to drive past our home to get to them! As in right past our driveway kind of past our home. So I totally get what you mean, her family is enmeshed like that. We are her "normal" friends - as in my parents are still married (first time for either of them), have only lived in three places in their married life (apartment, first home, current home), have steady jobs, etc... and the support always goes out to her, sometimes back to my mom, but never back to the rest of us in any real way. She also cannot keep a secret though she swears she is the keeper of everyone's secrets. I tested this a couple of times because my mom kept telling me that this aunt was upset because I didn't really "talk" to her anymore. So I told her some "secrets" that were not true and sure enough, she told not just my mom but also my gfgbro! And she embellished what I told her to the point of true crazy. Stay a text only friend. You will never regret staying out of this drama. I PROMISE!!! And Numby sure sounded like the right name when I posted it. [/QUOTE]
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