I don't know if anyone wants to talk about it, but I have been thinking about it lately because my daughter brought up something that I swear must have been a repressed memory. As soon as she reminded me, I kind of went into shock mode and started shaking. I've been thinking about it a lot since then. Certainly I had many signs that this was going to be a "different" type of child when 36 was 18 months, 2, 6, 8, etc., but I don't even remember how old he was when this happened. It scared me terribly for the first time and I told his therapist and I remember his therapist blew it off. He talked to 36 about it, but told me not to make too much of a big deal about it. So here is the story. I was talking to my daughter, who is Korean-adopted, and told her I'd like to buy an Asian doll dressed in Korean clothes for my soon-to-be-born granddaughter. She said, "Just don't get a rice paddy kid." A rice paddy kid was the Asian versian of Cabbage Patch kids and I'd had to send overseas for it and it was her special doll, big and chubby and dressed in a Koeran Han-bok (Dress). She carried it with her everywhere. One day she came home from school and she skipped off to her room while I was in the kitchen cooking. I heard a scream and saw 36 dart from behind a wall, smiling and I ran to my six year old daughter who was hysterical. When I got into her room I hugged her and she pushed at me, pointing and then I looked. On her wall, with a knife through the head and ketchup spread on it was her rice paddy kid doll. The head had been separated from the body and it was lying on her beautiful bed spread. She could not stop screaming. I wanted to scream. I was so horrified, I couldn't believe it. I have no memory of how I calmed her down or what even happened next or what I said to her or 36 or to my then husband, their father. Trust me, the way it was staged was not just "brother teasing sister." It was ripped. The knife was sharp. The ketchup looked like real blood. It was sick!!!! Another day, almost as bad, was the day he had mooned a passing car in junior high school and it had turned out to be his sixth grade teacher in the car. He had liked to show his body parts a lot. This came to haunt me as well because in no way was 36 normal when it came to sex. You'll have to take my word on that one. Anyhow...if you're up to it, when did you know? Was the child small? Older? In college? Did it take you by surprise? 36 had always been a chld obsssed with the gory, t he bloody, etc.