Oh boy, Lea ! You are not alone! We understand here. I welcome you, but am sorry for the reasons that led you to find this site.
I do not have time to write much now. But I want to acknowledge your post, and tell you that you have come to a safe place, a place to learn how to take of yourself, detach, and stay strong. My son is 36 years old. I first posted my situation 4 months ago on September 28th, a second thread again on November 6th, and a new one just recently this week. You can read my threads which will tell my story in more detail. You can read others’ threads by going to their profile page, click “postings” and then at the bottom of that page click “threads by XXX.”
Others here on the site also have older difficult children. And yes, those difficult children exhibit the behaviors you’ve described.
Yes, my son is just like this. I could have written every word of your post exactly about my own son. It freshly saddens my heart just to read your words. I have been learning how to detach, and how to not enable, and how to stay relatively peaceful most of the time.
There is a very valuable article at the top of this forum about Detachment. Take time to read this article over and over again. Learning detachment helps a lot. Here is the link. http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/article-on-detachment.53639/#axzz3zMMUqWes
This is late on Friday night in the United States, and sometimes weekends are slow on this site, but others will surely be along soon to welcome you and offer wisdom and guidance.
Take care and stay with us here. Reading others’ threads always seems to have a bit of wisdom to strengthen and comfort. We are glad you are here with us. You are going to be alright.
Kalahou
