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Substance Abuse
Does this ever end, he is now 33 and relapsing
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<blockquote data-quote="Tiredof33" data-source="post: 496095" data-attributes="member: 13558"><p>Thank you everyone for your support. Some of your posts make me feel so sad that others are going through the same turmoil. As mothers we are taught that it is <strong>our</strong> fault that our children turn out as they do. I am over that belief!! I have been in couseling with both of my children and I went through a lot of meetings with my son when he was in court ordered treatment. Some of the men in the center were in their 40's and on family events none of their families would show up. I let them know in a calm way that you get tired of your life revolving around them. It was an all day trip for me to visit my son. It is very important for family members to be involved with their lives for support <strong><em>when they are trying to help themsleves!</em></strong> </p><p></p><p>I still read a lot of self help books and every morning I thank the Universe for the good things in my life, I keep telling myself I am the master of my thoughts and what you reap you sow. I volunteer a lot and stay busy with my hobbies, I make myself get moving so I don't fall back into a depression. For years I blamed myself, no more! Their father was abusive and walked out on us and had no contact with them. I felt guilt for that, but now I look back on those times and don't know how I went through it by myself.</p><p></p><p>Regardless of what life throws at you it is your decision to feel sorry for yourself or be stronger. I apologised to my children years ago, then I said, 'I have a life too!'.</p><p></p><p>This witch has tried to make me feel guilty and told my daughter that I never loved him, only my daughter, and that I always paid more attention to my daughter. That he is so f***** up because of me. My daughter laughed when she told me about that message. She said if anything <strong>SHE</strong> was the one left out because he was always in trouble.</p><p></p><p>My daughter also had a fling with drugs and trouble with the law but counseling worked for her. She rode a bus for 2 hours to the court ordered counseling and 2 hours home. She said she is not proud of what she did and that both of them were bad kids. I told her that I forgave everything, I'm not perfect either. I also told them both that I did not go to bed at night thinking of ways to screw up their lives.</p><p></p><p>I did feel that he had a mental illness but nothing was ever diagnosed. He is an entirely different person when not on drugs, but the drugs have affected his mental reasoning. For them to stay out all night and still be awake to make harassing phone calls, it's more than pot and alcohol! I was told by a counselor that they are 'me' people and you are talking and fighting with the drugs.</p><p></p><p>I still bothers me or I would not be on this forum, it's a day by day process. I found this forum by accident and I am spending a lot of time reading, but it does help to cope. </p><p></p><p>Thank all of you for your honest posts. It was good to have a sibling's opinion! Have a blessed day!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tiredof33, post: 496095, member: 13558"] Thank you everyone for your support. Some of your posts make me feel so sad that others are going through the same turmoil. As mothers we are taught that it is [B]our[/B] fault that our children turn out as they do. I am over that belief!! I have been in couseling with both of my children and I went through a lot of meetings with my son when he was in court ordered treatment. Some of the men in the center were in their 40's and on family events none of their families would show up. I let them know in a calm way that you get tired of your life revolving around them. It was an all day trip for me to visit my son. It is very important for family members to be involved with their lives for support [B][I]when they are trying to help themsleves![/I][/B] I still read a lot of self help books and every morning I thank the Universe for the good things in my life, I keep telling myself I am the master of my thoughts and what you reap you sow. I volunteer a lot and stay busy with my hobbies, I make myself get moving so I don't fall back into a depression. For years I blamed myself, no more! Their father was abusive and walked out on us and had no contact with them. I felt guilt for that, but now I look back on those times and don't know how I went through it by myself. Regardless of what life throws at you it is your decision to feel sorry for yourself or be stronger. I apologised to my children years ago, then I said, 'I have a life too!'. This witch has tried to make me feel guilty and told my daughter that I never loved him, only my daughter, and that I always paid more attention to my daughter. That he is so f***** up because of me. My daughter laughed when she told me about that message. She said if anything [B]SHE[/B] was the one left out because he was always in trouble. My daughter also had a fling with drugs and trouble with the law but counseling worked for her. She rode a bus for 2 hours to the court ordered counseling and 2 hours home. She said she is not proud of what she did and that both of them were bad kids. I told her that I forgave everything, I'm not perfect either. I also told them both that I did not go to bed at night thinking of ways to screw up their lives. I did feel that he had a mental illness but nothing was ever diagnosed. He is an entirely different person when not on drugs, but the drugs have affected his mental reasoning. For them to stay out all night and still be awake to make harassing phone calls, it's more than pot and alcohol! I was told by a counselor that they are 'me' people and you are talking and fighting with the drugs. I still bothers me or I would not be on this forum, it's a day by day process. I found this forum by accident and I am spending a lot of time reading, but it does help to cope. Thank all of you for your honest posts. It was good to have a sibling's opinion! Have a blessed day! [/QUOTE]
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Does this ever end, he is now 33 and relapsing
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