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Does Your Family Step Up To The Plate?
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<blockquote data-quote="trinityroyal" data-source="post: 131198" data-attributes="member: 3907"><p>DDD, it's magic elf syndrome.</p><p></p><p>I'm very lucky that husband pitches in and does lots around the house. The children are another story altogether, though. When Step-D moved back home to look after difficult child for a few months last summer, I would come home from work every day to a house that looked like a bomb had gone off. Every dish in the house would be filthy, piles of stuff were stacked on every flat surface, trails of laundry up and down the halls, unmade beds, toys and other nonsense all over the back yard. It was a disaster.</p><p></p><p>I sat Step-D down and asked her why. Before losing my temper, I wanted to try to understand why she and difficult child were having so much trouble keeping ahead of the mess. Turns out she didn't know how to clean or tidy. She's seen me and her dad do it a million times, but she's not the type of person who learns by observing, nor is she the type who figures out what needs to be done by looking around. She needed to be told...in simple steps.</p><p></p><p>So I told her my expectations:</p><p>- I expect the house to be cleaned up before I come home from work. Here's how I do things</p><p>- Deal with the one thing before you start another. If you've been cooking and eating, clean up the food and dishes before you leave the kitchen. It's part of the meal</p><p>- If you're playing in the yard, put the yard toys away in the bin before you come inside.</p><p>- If you're playing a board game, put all of the pieces back in the box, and put the box back in the cupboard before you leave the room.</p><p>- etc.</p><p></p><p> I posted a list on the fridge, and things got way better. Not perfect, but something I could live with. I don't know if everyone is born resourceful. Some have to learn it. </p><p></p><p>DDD, hope your arm feels better soon and glad to hear that you have some help. Hope that your family pitches in.</p><p></p><p>All the best,</p><p>Trinity</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="trinityroyal, post: 131198, member: 3907"] DDD, it's magic elf syndrome. I'm very lucky that husband pitches in and does lots around the house. The children are another story altogether, though. When Step-D moved back home to look after difficult child for a few months last summer, I would come home from work every day to a house that looked like a bomb had gone off. Every dish in the house would be filthy, piles of stuff were stacked on every flat surface, trails of laundry up and down the halls, unmade beds, toys and other nonsense all over the back yard. It was a disaster. I sat Step-D down and asked her why. Before losing my temper, I wanted to try to understand why she and difficult child were having so much trouble keeping ahead of the mess. Turns out she didn't know how to clean or tidy. She's seen me and her dad do it a million times, but she's not the type of person who learns by observing, nor is she the type who figures out what needs to be done by looking around. She needed to be told...in simple steps. So I told her my expectations: - I expect the house to be cleaned up before I come home from work. Here's how I do things - Deal with the one thing before you start another. If you've been cooking and eating, clean up the food and dishes before you leave the kitchen. It's part of the meal - If you're playing in the yard, put the yard toys away in the bin before you come inside. - If you're playing a board game, put all of the pieces back in the box, and put the box back in the cupboard before you leave the room. - etc. I posted a list on the fridge, and things got way better. Not perfect, but something I could live with. I don't know if everyone is born resourceful. Some have to learn it. DDD, hope your arm feels better soon and glad to hear that you have some help. Hope that your family pitches in. All the best, Trinity [/QUOTE]
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