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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 511850" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>HI Gwen, sorry you are having to go through so much. Loss of his mother at that young age could be of course a HUGE factor in all of this. It is really a trust buster and can shape how a child views the whole world. They can feel they need to take care of themselves no matter what people think because they will never let anyone hurt them that way again. (even though you have given him love and care.... as they say in these cases, LOVE is not enough!....), and one classic symptom of an attachment disorder????? they can be really charming and deceiving to other people to make the parents seem like total jerks. A therapist who is not specialized in working with attachment disordered kids can do more damage than good because they polarize the child and parents. they buy into the poor me stuff that the kids put out there.</p><p></p><p>Not sure of this for you but here are some resources for you to investigate to see if this might be part of it (much of this is from adoption sites because that is a very common situation causing this issue but there are lots of known causes including chronic childhood pain that caregivers can't help, separations from parent (s) through no fault of anyone...just circumstances, of course situations like you mentioned when a parent leaves a child due to their own issues, etc... many ways this can happen so dont be put off by the origin of the sites, just see what you think. This is a spectrum issue so some sites only discuss the most severe/detached from humanity kinds of kids....but many of the sites look at the full range of insecure attachment and other kinds of attachment issues.</p><p></p><p><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_disorder" target="_blank">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_disorder</a></p><p></p><p><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reactive_attachment_disorder" target="_blank">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reactive_attachment_disorder</a></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 511850, member: 12886"] HI Gwen, sorry you are having to go through so much. Loss of his mother at that young age could be of course a HUGE factor in all of this. It is really a trust buster and can shape how a child views the whole world. They can feel they need to take care of themselves no matter what people think because they will never let anyone hurt them that way again. (even though you have given him love and care.... as they say in these cases, LOVE is not enough!....), and one classic symptom of an attachment disorder????? they can be really charming and deceiving to other people to make the parents seem like total jerks. A therapist who is not specialized in working with attachment disordered kids can do more damage than good because they polarize the child and parents. they buy into the poor me stuff that the kids put out there. Not sure of this for you but here are some resources for you to investigate to see if this might be part of it (much of this is from adoption sites because that is a very common situation causing this issue but there are lots of known causes including chronic childhood pain that caregivers can't help, separations from parent (s) through no fault of anyone...just circumstances, of course situations like you mentioned when a parent leaves a child due to their own issues, etc... many ways this can happen so dont be put off by the origin of the sites, just see what you think. This is a spectrum issue so some sites only discuss the most severe/detached from humanity kinds of kids....but many of the sites look at the full range of insecure attachment and other kinds of attachment issues. [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_disorder[/url] [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reactive_attachment_disorder[/url] [/QUOTE]
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