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Parent Emeritus
Don't know which way to go, could use some advice..............
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 512685" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Star---I can't express how much your words meant to me, especially today, you were right on target. If you aren't already, you should consider being a writer, you nailed it in an eloquent and very touching, real, human way, thank you so much. Big giant hugs to you for your hard won wisdom, tenderness and caring.</p><p></p><p>My SO had to call the car service yesterday to unlock my difficult child's car to give the cats water, she had ignored my calls that the cats needed water, or she had no way to get to my house, I don't know what happened, but she didn't call. They opened the doors and SO gave the poor critters water. He then, out of sheer frustration (I was at work) called the Animal Control Sheriff, who he has actually developed a relationship with. Two police cars showed up, the regular cops and the Animal Control Cop. They investigated the situation, checked that the cats had food and water, and that the car did not smell, and they concluded that they still had no grounds to remove the cats since they were still my daughter's property. One cop told SO that the only thing we could do at this point is to have the car towed away and impounded and then the cats will be taken out. He wasn't prepared to make that decision, so they are still with us. </p><p></p><p>SO took the tent down yesterday, so we have our porch back. </p><p></p><p>I just left a message with my difficult child about the cats and if we didn't hear from her today I would have the car towed away and impounded and the cats removed. </p><p></p><p>As I know all of you feel at times, I am beyond frustrated, angry, hurt and disappointed, I am drained of all emotion right now. I feel as if I have a deadline because we are going out of town. Even though we took the keys away from my difficult child, we are having the locks changed anyway. The cops told SO that the people my daughter was hanging out with are "tweekers" (meth) and very bad people. I never even heard that term before. She told me once she was arrested that she was no longer around those folks, but even if that's true, I feel at risk. What a way to leave town. </p><p></p><p>I know you all know how this feels. I feel numb. I can't think straight. I am so tired that I could put my head on my desk and go right to sleep. I have no more tolerance or patience left. The path for my difficult child would be so easy if she weren't putting up blocks to her own well being every step of the way. It's hard not to feel very angry at her. I realize it's mental illness. I recall reading a post here awhile back from someone who has bi-polar and she said, "mental illness doesn't give you a pass" on being irresponsible or rude. I don't know how much slack to give her because of her disability. She knows basic right from wrong. She can't put all the pieces together and form a whole life, it's as if her brain shattered and she can't put it back together in a way that allows for a coherent thought to filter through the fog. She is choosing the "hard bottom" I would have preferred the soft bottom, but she made the choices. </p><p></p><p>We may not know where we're going but we're on our way now, it's all heated up to reach critical mass now. Feels like it's about to come to a head.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 512685, member: 13542"] Star---I can't express how much your words meant to me, especially today, you were right on target. If you aren't already, you should consider being a writer, you nailed it in an eloquent and very touching, real, human way, thank you so much. Big giant hugs to you for your hard won wisdom, tenderness and caring. My SO had to call the car service yesterday to unlock my difficult child's car to give the cats water, she had ignored my calls that the cats needed water, or she had no way to get to my house, I don't know what happened, but she didn't call. They opened the doors and SO gave the poor critters water. He then, out of sheer frustration (I was at work) called the Animal Control Sheriff, who he has actually developed a relationship with. Two police cars showed up, the regular cops and the Animal Control Cop. They investigated the situation, checked that the cats had food and water, and that the car did not smell, and they concluded that they still had no grounds to remove the cats since they were still my daughter's property. One cop told SO that the only thing we could do at this point is to have the car towed away and impounded and then the cats will be taken out. He wasn't prepared to make that decision, so they are still with us. SO took the tent down yesterday, so we have our porch back. I just left a message with my difficult child about the cats and if we didn't hear from her today I would have the car towed away and impounded and the cats removed. As I know all of you feel at times, I am beyond frustrated, angry, hurt and disappointed, I am drained of all emotion right now. I feel as if I have a deadline because we are going out of town. Even though we took the keys away from my difficult child, we are having the locks changed anyway. The cops told SO that the people my daughter was hanging out with are "tweekers" (meth) and very bad people. I never even heard that term before. She told me once she was arrested that she was no longer around those folks, but even if that's true, I feel at risk. What a way to leave town. I know you all know how this feels. I feel numb. I can't think straight. I am so tired that I could put my head on my desk and go right to sleep. I have no more tolerance or patience left. The path for my difficult child would be so easy if she weren't putting up blocks to her own well being every step of the way. It's hard not to feel very angry at her. I realize it's mental illness. I recall reading a post here awhile back from someone who has bi-polar and she said, "mental illness doesn't give you a pass" on being irresponsible or rude. I don't know how much slack to give her because of her disability. She knows basic right from wrong. She can't put all the pieces together and form a whole life, it's as if her brain shattered and she can't put it back together in a way that allows for a coherent thought to filter through the fog. She is choosing the "hard bottom" I would have preferred the soft bottom, but she made the choices. We may not know where we're going but we're on our way now, it's all heated up to reach critical mass now. Feels like it's about to come to a head. [/QUOTE]
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Don't know which way to go, could use some advice..............
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