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Don't Understand abt the Court Stuff
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 302546" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I totally see where the stroke would come from. You are trying to handle the daily demands of life with a seriously disturbed difficult child and a more seriously disturbed gfghusband.</p><p></p><p>It is time to call your doctor and get some anxiety medications. At least for the short term. make sure you take your blood pressure regularly (at least weekly - many fire stations will do it for free if you stop by when they are not out at a fire. Some churches also offer it - our church has a nurse who will check it every other Sunday.)</p><p></p><p>I highly recommend xanax or a similar medication. Xanax has a bad rep but is still a valuable medication. I took it for years without ever increasing the dose. I took 1/2 of a .5 mg tablet (cheaper to buy 15 .5 mg tabs than 30 .25 mg tabs at that time). That 1/2 worked in 1/2 hour and really helped me handle things calmly and rationally. My GYN first rx'ed it. The pediatrician even gave it to my daughter when she was having panic attacks due to Wiz' abuse.</p><p></p><p>There are other anxiety medications but usually they do not work as quickly.</p><p></p><p>PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE get at least a call off to your doctor tomorrow. If he wants to see you maybe he could call something in for the weekend and you could see him on Monday or Tuesday.</p><p></p><p>Strokes are NOT something you want. You could have one before you get out of this marriage and then husband could get himself appointed your "guardian" and that would give him access to all your assets. he would have a great time with them and spend all of it, if his current behavior is any indication. If you have to go into a walk-in clinic or urgent care. </p><p></p><p>I think that if you don't go to court your husband will blame everything on your kids and you, and possible even ask for various orders to "protect" difficult child from you. If it isn't in his mind now it will be at some time. He could say your sons are the problem and could the court give poor difficult child a protective order against your sons. That would mean you have to find new places for your son to live that very day.</p><p></p><p>As for the competency meeting, well, he is blowing smoke up your hiney. No way was it that he is 12 and not competent because that. Hopefully the person evaluating did not fall for the innocent abused difficult child routine.</p><p></p><p>Touch base with the CPS worker and ask if she plans to express her concerns to the judge or just let it all fizzle away so difficult child gets no help.</p><p></p><p>If husband does his gatekeeper thing the courts could see HIM as the problem (this may be part of what was said at the evaluation). You do NOT want the court to say that husband has to be away from difficult child and difficult child should be living in his same home. </p><p></p><p>I am amazed the pub defender saw him. Here they often do not speak to a client or read the file until the morning of the court date. If it is complex they ask for a continuance and shuffle the folder aside until the next court date. Here is to hoping the PD has a difficult child in his/her family. Then the PD will be able to see through the nonsense.</p><p></p><p>I am pulling for you! Take care of yourself, make husband deal with his own finances. Take the $100 for the tire off of the $1000 for damaging your car!!!!! Cannot believe he did a grand worth of damage and had the audacity to ask for the tire money back!</p><p></p><p>If he is overdrawn, well, sorry. Since he would never keep his cell out of difficult child's reach then he deserves to have no cell. make sure your boys know to keep theirs out of reach and if difficult child does ruin one, well, don't be quick to jump into the fracas if they beat the cost out of difficult child. Maybe others will feel differently, but it really seems that it is the only thing that hasn't been tried repeatedly. Sometimes a little fear of your peers can go a LONG way to straightening things out. I am NOT saying to ahve an adult hurt him, but to let him work it out on his own with your sons if he ruins their stuff.</p><p></p><p>As for husband pouting and gritching about his truck, well, who let it get into that shape? I have a 1987 Chrysler LeBaron that always needs a jumpstart if it hasn't been started in the last 18 hours. One door doesn't open and it is a beater with no AC. But it can get up where we need to go here in town so it is fine by me.</p><p></p><p>Lots of hugs and a push to the phone to call the doctor!</p><p></p><p>Stay intouch and know I am pulling for you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 302546, member: 1233"] I totally see where the stroke would come from. You are trying to handle the daily demands of life with a seriously disturbed difficult child and a more seriously disturbed gfghusband. It is time to call your doctor and get some anxiety medications. At least for the short term. make sure you take your blood pressure regularly (at least weekly - many fire stations will do it for free if you stop by when they are not out at a fire. Some churches also offer it - our church has a nurse who will check it every other Sunday.) I highly recommend xanax or a similar medication. Xanax has a bad rep but is still a valuable medication. I took it for years without ever increasing the dose. I took 1/2 of a .5 mg tablet (cheaper to buy 15 .5 mg tabs than 30 .25 mg tabs at that time). That 1/2 worked in 1/2 hour and really helped me handle things calmly and rationally. My GYN first rx'ed it. The pediatrician even gave it to my daughter when she was having panic attacks due to Wiz' abuse. There are other anxiety medications but usually they do not work as quickly. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE get at least a call off to your doctor tomorrow. If he wants to see you maybe he could call something in for the weekend and you could see him on Monday or Tuesday. Strokes are NOT something you want. You could have one before you get out of this marriage and then husband could get himself appointed your "guardian" and that would give him access to all your assets. he would have a great time with them and spend all of it, if his current behavior is any indication. If you have to go into a walk-in clinic or urgent care. I think that if you don't go to court your husband will blame everything on your kids and you, and possible even ask for various orders to "protect" difficult child from you. If it isn't in his mind now it will be at some time. He could say your sons are the problem and could the court give poor difficult child a protective order against your sons. That would mean you have to find new places for your son to live that very day. As for the competency meeting, well, he is blowing smoke up your hiney. No way was it that he is 12 and not competent because that. Hopefully the person evaluating did not fall for the innocent abused difficult child routine. Touch base with the CPS worker and ask if she plans to express her concerns to the judge or just let it all fizzle away so difficult child gets no help. If husband does his gatekeeper thing the courts could see HIM as the problem (this may be part of what was said at the evaluation). You do NOT want the court to say that husband has to be away from difficult child and difficult child should be living in his same home. I am amazed the pub defender saw him. Here they often do not speak to a client or read the file until the morning of the court date. If it is complex they ask for a continuance and shuffle the folder aside until the next court date. Here is to hoping the PD has a difficult child in his/her family. Then the PD will be able to see through the nonsense. I am pulling for you! Take care of yourself, make husband deal with his own finances. Take the $100 for the tire off of the $1000 for damaging your car!!!!! Cannot believe he did a grand worth of damage and had the audacity to ask for the tire money back! If he is overdrawn, well, sorry. Since he would never keep his cell out of difficult child's reach then he deserves to have no cell. make sure your boys know to keep theirs out of reach and if difficult child does ruin one, well, don't be quick to jump into the fracas if they beat the cost out of difficult child. Maybe others will feel differently, but it really seems that it is the only thing that hasn't been tried repeatedly. Sometimes a little fear of your peers can go a LONG way to straightening things out. I am NOT saying to ahve an adult hurt him, but to let him work it out on his own with your sons if he ruins their stuff. As for husband pouting and gritching about his truck, well, who let it get into that shape? I have a 1987 Chrysler LeBaron that always needs a jumpstart if it hasn't been started in the last 18 hours. One door doesn't open and it is a beater with no AC. But it can get up where we need to go here in town so it is fine by me. Lots of hugs and a push to the phone to call the doctor! Stay intouch and know I am pulling for you. [/QUOTE]
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