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General Parenting
easy child and a big huge guilt trip
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<blockquote data-quote="TeDo" data-source="post: 584643" data-attributes="member: 15799"><p>To be honest, while I do feel for you and what you're going through, I do have to ask why difficult child isn't the one leaving? Besides all the changes he will be going through, I can see where "you choosing difficult child over him" would be a huge part of the equation FOR HIM. I can see where he might see it as him being punished because of difficult child. If you're in that bad of a place, to me, it would make sense to ship off the more stressful child. If there are problems with difficult child, they are DAD'S problems now. HE should have to deal with the problems that are dragging you down. I guess I just don't understand the whole thing myself. I don't mean to guilt you. That is not my intent by any means. I am just looking at it from the point of a parent with a high-stress child and a low-to-moderate stress child and mental health issues of my own. To me it would be common sense to take a break from the high-stress child. The last thing I would do is ship off my spectrum child because of a major difficult child.</p><p></p><p>I am sending supportive (((HUGS))) to you AND easy child/difficult child. I really hope he doesn't develop abandonment issues like my difficult child 1 has. Being on the spectrum magnifies the effects of the abandonment he feels and is unable to deal with. It's gonna be tough....on both of you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TeDo, post: 584643, member: 15799"] To be honest, while I do feel for you and what you're going through, I do have to ask why difficult child isn't the one leaving? Besides all the changes he will be going through, I can see where "you choosing difficult child over him" would be a huge part of the equation FOR HIM. I can see where he might see it as him being punished because of difficult child. If you're in that bad of a place, to me, it would make sense to ship off the more stressful child. If there are problems with difficult child, they are DAD'S problems now. HE should have to deal with the problems that are dragging you down. I guess I just don't understand the whole thing myself. I don't mean to guilt you. That is not my intent by any means. I am just looking at it from the point of a parent with a high-stress child and a low-to-moderate stress child and mental health issues of my own. To me it would be common sense to take a break from the high-stress child. The last thing I would do is ship off my spectrum child because of a major difficult child. I am sending supportive (((HUGS))) to you AND easy child/difficult child. I really hope he doesn't develop abandonment issues like my difficult child 1 has. Being on the spectrum magnifies the effects of the abandonment he feels and is unable to deal with. It's gonna be tough....on both of you. [/QUOTE]
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easy child and a big huge guilt trip
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