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General Parenting
easy child/difficult child-the good and the bad
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<blockquote data-quote="exhausted" data-source="post: 438804" data-attributes="member: 11001"><p>Sibling rivalry is hard. It gets tough when one kid seems to need more than the other. Even though my son was an adult when the issues began with his little sister, he was angry and over-protective of us (me especially). We had to include him in family sessions at the first Residential Treatment Center (RTC)-against his will, but then he was under our roof.....</p><p></p><p>Eventially he has learned to cope-better than us really. He loves her, but maintains a "safe distance" so as to not get caught in the stuff. At first we did have to lay down the law. He would get on her like glue continually. Finially we told him he was not the parent (which older siblings try to take on when they think parents are not very successful-I did this as the oldest child). I laid it out-"Your sister is not ok, her head isn't working the way it should. No amount of being rude and hateful is going to help her. I can't have you adding to my stress. Back off and give us some space and benefit of the doubt. We are doing the best we can and you do not need to help us parent her. Stay gone more, if it helps you cope, we get it." </p><p></p><p>We check in with him every week and include him everything we can. I think he finially realized she wasn't going to get better overnight and he could just be himself-no added responsibility.</p><p></p><p>Don't know if your daughter is feeling any of the same things-might be worth talking to her about it?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="exhausted, post: 438804, member: 11001"] Sibling rivalry is hard. It gets tough when one kid seems to need more than the other. Even though my son was an adult when the issues began with his little sister, he was angry and over-protective of us (me especially). We had to include him in family sessions at the first Residential Treatment Center (RTC)-against his will, but then he was under our roof..... Eventially he has learned to cope-better than us really. He loves her, but maintains a "safe distance" so as to not get caught in the stuff. At first we did have to lay down the law. He would get on her like glue continually. Finially we told him he was not the parent (which older siblings try to take on when they think parents are not very successful-I did this as the oldest child). I laid it out-"Your sister is not ok, her head isn't working the way it should. No amount of being rude and hateful is going to help her. I can't have you adding to my stress. Back off and give us some space and benefit of the doubt. We are doing the best we can and you do not need to help us parent her. Stay gone more, if it helps you cope, we get it." We check in with him every week and include him everything we can. I think he finially realized she wasn't going to get better overnight and he could just be himself-no added responsibility. Don't know if your daughter is feeling any of the same things-might be worth talking to her about it? [/QUOTE]
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easy child/difficult child-the good and the bad
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