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easy child wants to come home
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<blockquote data-quote="Steely" data-source="post: 433503" data-attributes="member: 3301"><p>I just want to ditto what susie said. I know it is hard to hear, but we really are telling you the truth.</p><p></p><p>And I will repeart the VERY best thing I EVER did was move away from home when I was 18. I was a easy child, that morphed into a difficult child from about 16-20. Had I been allowed to go home, all that anger I had, I can assure you would have been re-triggered and taken out on my parents. And my little sister at that time idolized every move I made. She was your difficult child's age. It broke her heart when I left, and had I come back with all that anger still stored inside, I would have also invariably taken it out on her and hurt her too - which would have been devastating for me to realize as my life went down the road.</p><p></p><p>I lived with friends, and always had a job, and lived on ramen noodles - but at age 20 I made a full circle recovery into adulthood. I think that is what everyone is trying to tell you. If you want the best for her, let her figure this out on her own. There are a million ways she can do it - and none of them are your responsibility to figure out. She still has tons of anger, none of that went away - and it WILL come back out - it is impossible for anger to just dissolve without a lot of therapy and work.</p><p></p><p>I hope you and husband read these posts together as you make your decisions - and I wish you the best of luck.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Steely, post: 433503, member: 3301"] I just want to ditto what susie said. I know it is hard to hear, but we really are telling you the truth. And I will repeart the VERY best thing I EVER did was move away from home when I was 18. I was a easy child, that morphed into a difficult child from about 16-20. Had I been allowed to go home, all that anger I had, I can assure you would have been re-triggered and taken out on my parents. And my little sister at that time idolized every move I made. She was your difficult child's age. It broke her heart when I left, and had I come back with all that anger still stored inside, I would have also invariably taken it out on her and hurt her too - which would have been devastating for me to realize as my life went down the road. I lived with friends, and always had a job, and lived on ramen noodles - but at age 20 I made a full circle recovery into adulthood. I think that is what everyone is trying to tell you. If you want the best for her, let her figure this out on her own. There are a million ways she can do it - and none of them are your responsibility to figure out. She still has tons of anger, none of that went away - and it WILL come back out - it is impossible for anger to just dissolve without a lot of therapy and work. I hope you and husband read these posts together as you make your decisions - and I wish you the best of luck. [/QUOTE]
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