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Substance Abuse
end of my rope
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<blockquote data-quote="missy44" data-source="post: 383342" data-attributes="member: 6201"><p>I'm sorry you are going through this. I've been through this with my difficult child who is now 20 and on the road to recovery. I live day by day and don't look beyond. My difficult child was similar to yours and the bad choices just kept snowballing. At first I was in denial, then I went through the protective stage, then I went through the stage of helping him with everything thinking I could turn his life around. Finally I went with a tough line. My difficult child was 18 at the time this spiralled out of control, so my control as a parent was very limited. I finally had to have him leave our home and told him he could not come back. It broke my heart to see him using, sleeping in the streets and just generally so unhappy, but I couldn't live the life I was living anymore. My therapist opened my eyes one day, he asked me I wwhy I was so afraid of having difficult child leave considering all the dealbreakers. I told him I didn't want difficult child to die. My therapist told me that with all I was doing * I was surely going to help him kill himself*. I was just providing the means for him to keep using, stealing, etc... That shook me to the core, I didn't want to find him dead in my home. I didn't want my other children to find him that way.</p><p> </p><p>I don't have the answers and I've made alot of mistakes along the way. But, you need to stop enabling, somehow, someway and take your life back.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="missy44, post: 383342, member: 6201"] I'm sorry you are going through this. I've been through this with my difficult child who is now 20 and on the road to recovery. I live day by day and don't look beyond. My difficult child was similar to yours and the bad choices just kept snowballing. At first I was in denial, then I went through the protective stage, then I went through the stage of helping him with everything thinking I could turn his life around. Finally I went with a tough line. My difficult child was 18 at the time this spiralled out of control, so my control as a parent was very limited. I finally had to have him leave our home and told him he could not come back. It broke my heart to see him using, sleeping in the streets and just generally so unhappy, but I couldn't live the life I was living anymore. My therapist opened my eyes one day, he asked me I wwhy I was so afraid of having difficult child leave considering all the dealbreakers. I told him I didn't want difficult child to die. My therapist told me that with all I was doing * I was surely going to help him kill himself*. I was just providing the means for him to keep using, stealing, etc... That shook me to the core, I didn't want to find him dead in my home. I didn't want my other children to find him that way. I don't have the answers and I've made alot of mistakes along the way. But, you need to stop enabling, somehow, someway and take your life back. [/QUOTE]
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