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Enough IS Enough..Kicking Doors,Screaming Bloody Murder...Im just no good..
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<blockquote data-quote="TeDo" data-source="post: 504900"><p>Confused, I am really sorry you are having a tough time. You are doing the best you can with what you have and none of us will fault you for that. We don't fault anyone. We simply offer advice based on our experiences. I haven't had the unique issues you are dealing with. </p><p></p><p>How often does he see his father? If he's saying things like that, he's struggling to balance your expectations VS your ex's. What kid wouldn't like it the way it sounds like it is at Disney Dad's? He'd be crazy NOT to want his whole life to be like that. He's only 5 and still has a very skewed idea of what life "should" be like. He doesn't understand why "Dad can do it but Mom WON'T". That is how a typical five year old thinks.</p><p></p><p>You need to take a deep breath. Now take another one. And another one. Yes, sleep problems can cause huge problems. Yes, being sick can cause huge problems. Transitions can cause huge problems. Change in routine can cause huge problems. Differing realities can cause huge problems. It is not you. When he is raging, try not talking to him AT ALL. If he picks up something to throw, "calmly" walk over and take it away without a word, pick him up and move him somewhere that there is nothing to throw. by the way, have you removed everything from his room except his bed & dresser? That could be his timeout space but since he resorts to throwing, you might want it empty for the most part.</p><p></p><p>I REALLY suggest you read What Your Explosive Child Is Trying To Tell You by Dr. Doug Riley. He explains things that COULD be causing things but he also gives IDEAS on how to handle it and how to teach alternatives. Ross Greene's book The Explosive Child teaches you how to talk to your kids so YOU can LEARN HOW THEY think. You can't fix what's broken until you know exactly WHY it's broken. You have a very small idea of what the Why is, but in order to "fix" it and deal with it you need to know the WHOLE Why.</p><p></p><p>In the meantime, keep in mind that "normal" punishments don't work with our kids. Teaching skills and alternatives they lack work.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TeDo, post: 504900"] Confused, I am really sorry you are having a tough time. You are doing the best you can with what you have and none of us will fault you for that. We don't fault anyone. We simply offer advice based on our experiences. I haven't had the unique issues you are dealing with. How often does he see his father? If he's saying things like that, he's struggling to balance your expectations VS your ex's. What kid wouldn't like it the way it sounds like it is at Disney Dad's? He'd be crazy NOT to want his whole life to be like that. He's only 5 and still has a very skewed idea of what life "should" be like. He doesn't understand why "Dad can do it but Mom WON'T". That is how a typical five year old thinks. You need to take a deep breath. Now take another one. And another one. Yes, sleep problems can cause huge problems. Yes, being sick can cause huge problems. Transitions can cause huge problems. Change in routine can cause huge problems. Differing realities can cause huge problems. It is not you. When he is raging, try not talking to him AT ALL. If he picks up something to throw, "calmly" walk over and take it away without a word, pick him up and move him somewhere that there is nothing to throw. by the way, have you removed everything from his room except his bed & dresser? That could be his timeout space but since he resorts to throwing, you might want it empty for the most part. I REALLY suggest you read What Your Explosive Child Is Trying To Tell You by Dr. Doug Riley. He explains things that COULD be causing things but he also gives IDEAS on how to handle it and how to teach alternatives. Ross Greene's book The Explosive Child teaches you how to talk to your kids so YOU can LEARN HOW THEY think. You can't fix what's broken until you know exactly WHY it's broken. You have a very small idea of what the Why is, but in order to "fix" it and deal with it you need to know the WHOLE Why. In the meantime, keep in mind that "normal" punishments don't work with our kids. Teaching skills and alternatives they lack work. [/QUOTE]
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Enough IS Enough..Kicking Doors,Screaming Bloody Murder...Im just no good..
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