Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Enough pain, lies and hurt - the boy needs to go.
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="sodamnweary" data-source="post: 643592" data-attributes="member: 18677"><p>Thanks for the above comments - it helps to know that I'm not alone but I agree that I wish there were face to face talks among us. Actually I'm going to a Al-Anon meeting tonight, something I was told a year ago to start attending when my son started rehab. I need to find some peace and things are so bad that I have to try anything at this point (including meditation, daily walks, etc...). I understand about feeling broken and beaten down. There have been so many times when I think I just can't do it anymore. Maybe I've also somewhat isolated myself in recent years as I think I'M a bit depressed because of this incredible dysfunction and pain in my house. Yes, my husband has NEVER been "on the same page", never supported anything - I've always considered myself a single parent. The ironic part is that we had the best time for the 11 years together before kids - I was so young when I started with him (19) and know nothing else but if I had a crystal ball back then, I would've run the other direction. I'm still fortunate though in ways as he's provided a privileged life for all of us, hasn't strayed, is hard-working, etc... I also realize how unfair and irrational it is being angry with him because his genes gave this kid his problems, but that's the way I feel. I've told him that I have to try to get past my anger and resentment and move on, but I wonder if I can do that. I also understand about the anxiety of waiting for the next ball to drop. I knew things were getting worse with my son in 2013 and after several doctors., that's what eventually led him to rehab. I had no idea he was into what he was and still can't understand it. I'm angry at his prior shrink who missed all of the warning signs that I now know, despite me pointing out to the shrink many times what in fact were these warning signs. I thought things would dramatically improve now that he's clean for a year, and some things slightly have, but I believe he's suffering from "dry drunk" syndrome - removed his substance abuse but hasn't continued with the rest of his rehabilitation. He takes antidepressants and he claims they help, which I understand would actually make things worse if he were bipolar. I had him at another dr. this summer and that one added an impulse control/anger disorder to the mix. I'm insisting that he get his own place for EVERYONE'S sake and I'm hoping that improves things. I still have hope that this kid will turn out better than he is now but they teach you in rehab (which I also attended as part of his program) that you have to save yourself first. I feel this way now but that can change tomorrow and I'm back trying to fix and save this kid. It's beyond exhausting.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="sodamnweary, post: 643592, member: 18677"] Thanks for the above comments - it helps to know that I'm not alone but I agree that I wish there were face to face talks among us. Actually I'm going to a Al-Anon meeting tonight, something I was told a year ago to start attending when my son started rehab. I need to find some peace and things are so bad that I have to try anything at this point (including meditation, daily walks, etc...). I understand about feeling broken and beaten down. There have been so many times when I think I just can't do it anymore. Maybe I've also somewhat isolated myself in recent years as I think I'M a bit depressed because of this incredible dysfunction and pain in my house. Yes, my husband has NEVER been "on the same page", never supported anything - I've always considered myself a single parent. The ironic part is that we had the best time for the 11 years together before kids - I was so young when I started with him (19) and know nothing else but if I had a crystal ball back then, I would've run the other direction. I'm still fortunate though in ways as he's provided a privileged life for all of us, hasn't strayed, is hard-working, etc... I also realize how unfair and irrational it is being angry with him because his genes gave this kid his problems, but that's the way I feel. I've told him that I have to try to get past my anger and resentment and move on, but I wonder if I can do that. I also understand about the anxiety of waiting for the next ball to drop. I knew things were getting worse with my son in 2013 and after several doctors., that's what eventually led him to rehab. I had no idea he was into what he was and still can't understand it. I'm angry at his prior shrink who missed all of the warning signs that I now know, despite me pointing out to the shrink many times what in fact were these warning signs. I thought things would dramatically improve now that he's clean for a year, and some things slightly have, but I believe he's suffering from "dry drunk" syndrome - removed his substance abuse but hasn't continued with the rest of his rehabilitation. He takes antidepressants and he claims they help, which I understand would actually make things worse if he were bipolar. I had him at another dr. this summer and that one added an impulse control/anger disorder to the mix. I'm insisting that he get his own place for EVERYONE'S sake and I'm hoping that improves things. I still have hope that this kid will turn out better than he is now but they teach you in rehab (which I also attended as part of his program) that you have to save yourself first. I feel this way now but that can change tomorrow and I'm back trying to fix and save this kid. It's beyond exhausting. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Enough pain, lies and hurt - the boy needs to go.
Top