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Estranged difficult child and grandchild
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<blockquote data-quote="Siobhan Harper" data-source="post: 577909" data-attributes="member: 15902"><p>Thanks, SuZir and recoveringdisabler, for your responses and suggestions. by the way, I've created a signature that I will try to use at the end of this post.</p><p></p><p>Am especially interested in the information regarding grandparents' rights. From what little research I've done, they seem to vary from state to state. I live in rural New England, so I'll explore the possibilities here. It has occured to me to talk to CPS "before" anything happens, so that we would have a contact who knows us if a crisis occurs.</p><p></p><p>GMG walked out on SO and baby this weekend following an argument. Took their only car. He has done this before but has always come back, and she always takes him back, and the cycle continues. She reached out to husband, who both saw her and continually texted over the weekend, offering any help she needs. She always walks right up to the line of accepting help, then backs off and doesn't respond at all. Until lately, she had no contact with her parents, but this weekend, her mother came and stayed and drove her to work. (Note: Mother has only recently left longterm boyfriend who molested and beat up her and her children, including difficult child's SO. Mother has a history of going back to the abuser. Other family includes drug users.) </p><p></p><p>difficult child holds jobs short-term, then quits or is fired, due to unreliability. He receives disability payments as a result of combat injuries in Afghanistan. He makes and loses friends easily. Basically charms young women, they get together, then find out what lies beneath the polite, put-together surface. First wife bailed (wisely!) when the hitting started. Current SO just wants to be with someone, has only a HS diploma, so holds low-paying jobs. They were working alternating shifts to handle baby care; don't know what the plan is now. Again, we're ready, willing, and able to help, but she just can't seem to make the final step that would allow us to assist.</p><p></p><p>It terrifies me to think what may happen to my grandchild; everyday is one day closer to her becoming cognizant of all the dysfunction in her life. She's already been exposed to domestic violence and drug use as an infant. She'll be one-year-old this month; I'd give anything to get her out of this hell before irreparable damage is done. New research shows that the first 5 years are the most critical of a child's life; long before they can express their impressions, brain damage can occur simply from being in a super stressful environment. As much as I love my difficult child, I'm most worried about the baby.</p><p></p><p>Again, thank you for the encouragement, empathy, and suggestions. I'm going to start serious research on grandparental rights in my state asap.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Siobhan Harper, post: 577909, member: 15902"] Thanks, SuZir and recoveringdisabler, for your responses and suggestions. by the way, I've created a signature that I will try to use at the end of this post. Am especially interested in the information regarding grandparents' rights. From what little research I've done, they seem to vary from state to state. I live in rural New England, so I'll explore the possibilities here. It has occured to me to talk to CPS "before" anything happens, so that we would have a contact who knows us if a crisis occurs. GMG walked out on SO and baby this weekend following an argument. Took their only car. He has done this before but has always come back, and she always takes him back, and the cycle continues. She reached out to husband, who both saw her and continually texted over the weekend, offering any help she needs. She always walks right up to the line of accepting help, then backs off and doesn't respond at all. Until lately, she had no contact with her parents, but this weekend, her mother came and stayed and drove her to work. (Note: Mother has only recently left longterm boyfriend who molested and beat up her and her children, including difficult child's SO. Mother has a history of going back to the abuser. Other family includes drug users.) difficult child holds jobs short-term, then quits or is fired, due to unreliability. He receives disability payments as a result of combat injuries in Afghanistan. He makes and loses friends easily. Basically charms young women, they get together, then find out what lies beneath the polite, put-together surface. First wife bailed (wisely!) when the hitting started. Current SO just wants to be with someone, has only a HS diploma, so holds low-paying jobs. They were working alternating shifts to handle baby care; don't know what the plan is now. Again, we're ready, willing, and able to help, but she just can't seem to make the final step that would allow us to assist. It terrifies me to think what may happen to my grandchild; everyday is one day closer to her becoming cognizant of all the dysfunction in her life. She's already been exposed to domestic violence and drug use as an infant. She'll be one-year-old this month; I'd give anything to get her out of this hell before irreparable damage is done. New research shows that the first 5 years are the most critical of a child's life; long before they can express their impressions, brain damage can occur simply from being in a super stressful environment. As much as I love my difficult child, I'm most worried about the baby. Again, thank you for the encouragement, empathy, and suggestions. I'm going to start serious research on grandparental rights in my state asap. [/QUOTE]
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