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Parent Emeritus
Estranged difficult child and grandchild
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<blockquote data-quote="Tiredof33" data-source="post: 578406" data-attributes="member: 13558"><p>It is a very hard, hard decision to make. No one can make it for you and each of us has the same general type of problem with different players.</p><p></p><p>I didn't really believe in 'codependent' 10 years ago, even Dr. Phil said on one of his shows it didn't exist. Then I started reading the many books out there on the subject and I am a classic case of an enabler. We want the best for our loved ones and we always put oursleves last. We help them start over and start over and start over. </p><p></p><p>Standing up for yourself can appear to be mean to someone that doesn't have the type of child we do. Meditate, pray to your HP, and just 'go with the flow', the answer(s) will come to you.</p><p></p><p>I just know the harrassment, conning me for money, and hacking into my computer made me draw the line in the sand. I have 'put up with this' for too long and I refuse to try to help someone that is not willing to help themselves. I have learned that as much as it breaks my heart I can not save him, he has to save himself.</p><p></p><p>When it is time for you to step back you will, and not until you are ready. That doesn't make you weak or strong, it just is what it is. </p><p></p><p>(((huggs and blessings)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tiredof33, post: 578406, member: 13558"] It is a very hard, hard decision to make. No one can make it for you and each of us has the same general type of problem with different players. I didn't really believe in 'codependent' 10 years ago, even Dr. Phil said on one of his shows it didn't exist. Then I started reading the many books out there on the subject and I am a classic case of an enabler. We want the best for our loved ones and we always put oursleves last. We help them start over and start over and start over. Standing up for yourself can appear to be mean to someone that doesn't have the type of child we do. Meditate, pray to your HP, and just 'go with the flow', the answer(s) will come to you. I just know the harrassment, conning me for money, and hacking into my computer made me draw the line in the sand. I have 'put up with this' for too long and I refuse to try to help someone that is not willing to help themselves. I have learned that as much as it breaks my heart I can not save him, he has to save himself. When it is time for you to step back you will, and not until you are ready. That doesn't make you weak or strong, it just is what it is. (((huggs and blessings))) [/QUOTE]
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Estranged difficult child and grandchild
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