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Excuse Me I need to Vent before I explode.
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 382098" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I know you are livid, and that you have more than every right to be feeling that way. At some point when you can be coldly logical, ask yourself if you are in a marriage or a babysitting relationship. Then ask if you can realistically expect things to change. When you get a job and can pay the bills yourself, ask yourself if you want to stay in that situation for the rest of your life. If not, make a plan of action to change things.</p><p> </p><p>You have had a whole lot of years of frustration and unhappiness with this man. If he will not work, can he get disability? Would you be willing to stay with him, do ALL the work that you have always done, if he brought in that little bit of income (and felt he had the right to say how that income was spent, because of course he will feel and act that way)?</p><p> </p><p>You are on the edge of having some financial freedom - the freedom to earn your own living. Now you have to decide how you want to live. Remember that you have health issues that will likely limit the number of years you can work, esp at the more strenuous nursing jobs. Also remember that a lot of the time, emotional problems take a HUGE toll on health issues. </p><p> </p><p>How do you REALLY want to spend the rest of your life? What realistic steps do you need to take to be able to do that? You have already taken the steps to get the education so that you can get the job you always wanted. What is next?</p><p> </p><p>IF you choose to kick him out, make SURE you get the biggest shark of a divorce attorney possible. Then do what he/she says. If you decide to stay in the relationship, what will you have to do/accept to keep it? Will it be worth doing/accepting that?</p><p> </p><p>Only you can answer these questions. NO judgements of you will be made, regardless of your choices!! Just make sure that you make conscious choices.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 382098, member: 1233"] I know you are livid, and that you have more than every right to be feeling that way. At some point when you can be coldly logical, ask yourself if you are in a marriage or a babysitting relationship. Then ask if you can realistically expect things to change. When you get a job and can pay the bills yourself, ask yourself if you want to stay in that situation for the rest of your life. If not, make a plan of action to change things. You have had a whole lot of years of frustration and unhappiness with this man. If he will not work, can he get disability? Would you be willing to stay with him, do ALL the work that you have always done, if he brought in that little bit of income (and felt he had the right to say how that income was spent, because of course he will feel and act that way)? You are on the edge of having some financial freedom - the freedom to earn your own living. Now you have to decide how you want to live. Remember that you have health issues that will likely limit the number of years you can work, esp at the more strenuous nursing jobs. Also remember that a lot of the time, emotional problems take a HUGE toll on health issues. How do you REALLY want to spend the rest of your life? What realistic steps do you need to take to be able to do that? You have already taken the steps to get the education so that you can get the job you always wanted. What is next? IF you choose to kick him out, make SURE you get the biggest shark of a divorce attorney possible. Then do what he/she says. If you decide to stay in the relationship, what will you have to do/accept to keep it? Will it be worth doing/accepting that? Only you can answer these questions. NO judgements of you will be made, regardless of your choices!! Just make sure that you make conscious choices. [/QUOTE]
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