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General Parenting
explosive child vs. love and logic
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<blockquote data-quote="gcvmom" data-source="post: 403260" data-attributes="member: 3444"><p>I can't say that I do anything consistently, however, we do get around to implementing Plan B as often as we can possibly can. There are times, especially when emotions are running high, that it has to be put in Basket C and returned to at a later time. I've found, though, that the more often my kid feels like his concerns or needs are being addressed, the more willing he is to negotiate a compromise because he knows that I will try to be fair. If I try the Basket A/My-Way-Or-The-Highway with everything, I could never get to Basket B. Same thing with Basket C. I think it all boils down to establishing expectations that are reasonable and being flexible enough to know when those expectations need to be adjusted.</p><p> </p><p>Here's one example from our life: difficult child has homework. It has to get done. difficult child is tired and doesn't want to do the homework. I try to come up with a compromise that helps difficult child deal with both issues. In this case, I might suggest having something to eat, taking a specified break time, and then returning to the homework at the end of the break. Usually this proves to be an acceptable arrangement for both of us. However, there are some days when it becomes a Basket C item, especially if emotions are running high.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gcvmom, post: 403260, member: 3444"] I can't say that I do anything consistently, however, we do get around to implementing Plan B as often as we can possibly can. There are times, especially when emotions are running high, that it has to be put in Basket C and returned to at a later time. I've found, though, that the more often my kid feels like his concerns or needs are being addressed, the more willing he is to negotiate a compromise because he knows that I will try to be fair. If I try the Basket A/My-Way-Or-The-Highway with everything, I could never get to Basket B. Same thing with Basket C. I think it all boils down to establishing expectations that are reasonable and being flexible enough to know when those expectations need to be adjusted. Here's one example from our life: difficult child has homework. It has to get done. difficult child is tired and doesn't want to do the homework. I try to come up with a compromise that helps difficult child deal with both issues. In this case, I might suggest having something to eat, taking a specified break time, and then returning to the homework at the end of the break. Usually this proves to be an acceptable arrangement for both of us. However, there are some days when it becomes a Basket C item, especially if emotions are running high. [/QUOTE]
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