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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 661585" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>I would be careful naming something that may be totally honest take of events as manipulation. One has to remember that just being in wrong does not equal to dishonesty. When people thought that sun circled the earth, they were not dishonest or manipulative; they were just massively wrong. </p><p></p><p>People have different thought processes. That someone sees things very differently from majority, they often are not dishonest or manipulative, they really think and believe that way. But from majority's point of view they may still be very wrong. </p><p></p><p>With Ache, who is not totally neurologically typical, we call this gap between his thought process and popular understanding as 'errors in the world.' We came up with the concept to try to teach him that most people may have a very different take of same events than he does and to both validate that his take was real and possible interpretation, but because most people would likely not share that interpretation, he would need to deal with their feelings and actions that is based on their interpretation.</p><p></p><p>Most people with clear neurological differences have very different thought processes but there are also really a lot of people, who have some issues with this, but who mostly function well. For example Ache's girlfriend really do not consider that someone's appearance should be a factor in workmarket if it has no direct correlation to the job. She is aware it does, but she finds it offensive and does not want to buy into it. Let's just say that she has very striking, unique and original appearance that you do not often see in business world. She thinks that if someone will not hire her because of that, it is their loss. At this time she is still getting away with it. She may need to consider later if she wants to be one of those who are hid behind the locked doors when ever the company has customers visiting (while they still are vital to the functioning of the company) or if she wants to have a different type of career; or if she finds the way to have her cake and eat it too. Well, she still has time, but I have to say I know a lot of people who have taken similar stance to formalities or customs they do not see a point of.</p><p></p><p>People who are manipulative are often very good at playing with these expectations. They do dress the part, they do utter apologises and show even excess remorse when expected, and say all the right words, because that is what works when you try to manipulate. Not saying the right things isn't manipulating, it tends to be genuine lack of understanding why the fuss. Again, it doesn't make it right, but it makes it genuine. If you are aiming for manipulation, you try to fulfill other's expectations for things like showing remorse instead of acting like you do not understand the problem.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 661585, member: 14557"] I would be careful naming something that may be totally honest take of events as manipulation. One has to remember that just being in wrong does not equal to dishonesty. When people thought that sun circled the earth, they were not dishonest or manipulative; they were just massively wrong. People have different thought processes. That someone sees things very differently from majority, they often are not dishonest or manipulative, they really think and believe that way. But from majority's point of view they may still be very wrong. With Ache, who is not totally neurologically typical, we call this gap between his thought process and popular understanding as 'errors in the world.' We came up with the concept to try to teach him that most people may have a very different take of same events than he does and to both validate that his take was real and possible interpretation, but because most people would likely not share that interpretation, he would need to deal with their feelings and actions that is based on their interpretation. Most people with clear neurological differences have very different thought processes but there are also really a lot of people, who have some issues with this, but who mostly function well. For example Ache's girlfriend really do not consider that someone's appearance should be a factor in workmarket if it has no direct correlation to the job. She is aware it does, but she finds it offensive and does not want to buy into it. Let's just say that she has very striking, unique and original appearance that you do not often see in business world. She thinks that if someone will not hire her because of that, it is their loss. At this time she is still getting away with it. She may need to consider later if she wants to be one of those who are hid behind the locked doors when ever the company has customers visiting (while they still are vital to the functioning of the company) or if she wants to have a different type of career; or if she finds the way to have her cake and eat it too. Well, she still has time, but I have to say I know a lot of people who have taken similar stance to formalities or customs they do not see a point of. People who are manipulative are often very good at playing with these expectations. They do dress the part, they do utter apologises and show even excess remorse when expected, and say all the right words, because that is what works when you try to manipulate. Not saying the right things isn't manipulating, it tends to be genuine lack of understanding why the fuss. Again, it doesn't make it right, but it makes it genuine. If you are aiming for manipulation, you try to fulfill other's expectations for things like showing remorse instead of acting like you do not understand the problem. [/QUOTE]
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