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Parent Emeritus
Feeling Torn, No Win Situation
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 728870" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Don't feel bad. Guardianship is legal a d hard to get if the adult doesn't have a doctor's note that endorses it and the adult is against it. You can't get SSI either. He has to do it.</p><p></p><p>Most guardianship is for cognitively different adults. My son has autism and I had guardianship for years. Then he didn't want me to be his guardian anymore and we went to court and his case manager said he didn't need a guardian so the judge agreed. I did not really fight it because he tries hard and I never did tell him what to do. Even if you are a guardian, you can't make them do what you want if they don't want to. And you need a clear cut diagnosis that says the adult is incapable of taking care of himself. Not that he won't. That he can't. It's not easy to get it. It could be that the kids of those who have guardianship are not capable of caring for themselves....you don't know their stories.</p><p></p><p>I think it's smart not to fight your son over it...you probably would lose and he would be even angrier. My son wanted me to be his guardian when I was. He has no guardian now but has a payee. That is easier to get. I know a lot of mentally ill people glad to have payees. I don't know how to go about getting one. My son is fine with a payee and just did the guardian/payee from high school. So it was easy. One court trip and done. He had records from birth. That's important too.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 728870, member: 1550"] Don't feel bad. Guardianship is legal a d hard to get if the adult doesn't have a doctor's note that endorses it and the adult is against it. You can't get SSI either. He has to do it. Most guardianship is for cognitively different adults. My son has autism and I had guardianship for years. Then he didn't want me to be his guardian anymore and we went to court and his case manager said he didn't need a guardian so the judge agreed. I did not really fight it because he tries hard and I never did tell him what to do. Even if you are a guardian, you can't make them do what you want if they don't want to. And you need a clear cut diagnosis that says the adult is incapable of taking care of himself. Not that he won't. That he can't. It's not easy to get it. It could be that the kids of those who have guardianship are not capable of caring for themselves....you don't know their stories. I think it's smart not to fight your son over it...you probably would lose and he would be even angrier. My son wanted me to be his guardian when I was. He has no guardian now but has a payee. That is easier to get. I know a lot of mentally ill people glad to have payees. I don't know how to go about getting one. My son is fine with a payee and just did the guardian/payee from high school. So it was easy. One court trip and done. He had records from birth. That's important too. [/QUOTE]
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Feeling Torn, No Win Situation
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