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General Parenting
Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS)/Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) parents - Would you adopt again?
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 498785" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>Such a good question. when I was in my late thirties and early forties I thought about this more. I never once considered it because I knew my son needed me exclusively, and he is still young. I have thought many times that I would consider doing foster care once he is out of the home though. I would not adopt internationally at this point (I would have loved to) because I know that I can get supports in terms of therapy and insurance and stipends through foster to adopt in the US. I am not saying that because I dont want to spend money, but because like what happened in our case, if you are forced to really fully care for your child 24/7 and can't maintain your out of home job... or if their therapy needs go beyond standard insurance, then the public assistance for them is really needed (I dont get any public assistance for ME, just he does and that includes my staying home to care for him). </p><p></p><p>I have no regrets but I don't have a child (at this time, and I hope not ever) who is a danger to others or society in general. We have had times like that but it is not the standard that I have to live with. </p><p></p><p>I would actually be more likely to accept placement of a very daughter child, a physically impaired child, a deaf child....but Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) is not exclusive of these things so I would definitely need open records. I was even allowed to talk to the foster mom before accepting placement and she had him from seven months till he came to me at 2 yrs 10 months... I got the personal scoop including about her visits with the bio parents. </p><p></p><p>I think I am too old now (48) to adopt a young child. I would (if no Q in my home) take a child into my home for sure... an older child. But would I adopt?? Just would all depend.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 498785, member: 12886"] Such a good question. when I was in my late thirties and early forties I thought about this more. I never once considered it because I knew my son needed me exclusively, and he is still young. I have thought many times that I would consider doing foster care once he is out of the home though. I would not adopt internationally at this point (I would have loved to) because I know that I can get supports in terms of therapy and insurance and stipends through foster to adopt in the US. I am not saying that because I dont want to spend money, but because like what happened in our case, if you are forced to really fully care for your child 24/7 and can't maintain your out of home job... or if their therapy needs go beyond standard insurance, then the public assistance for them is really needed (I dont get any public assistance for ME, just he does and that includes my staying home to care for him). I have no regrets but I don't have a child (at this time, and I hope not ever) who is a danger to others or society in general. We have had times like that but it is not the standard that I have to live with. I would actually be more likely to accept placement of a very daughter child, a physically impaired child, a deaf child....but Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) is not exclusive of these things so I would definitely need open records. I was even allowed to talk to the foster mom before accepting placement and she had him from seven months till he came to me at 2 yrs 10 months... I got the personal scoop including about her visits with the bio parents. I think I am too old now (48) to adopt a young child. I would (if no Q in my home) take a child into my home for sure... an older child. But would I adopt?? Just would all depend. [/QUOTE]
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