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General Parenting
Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS)/Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) parents - Would you adopt again?
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<blockquote data-quote="CopingWithRad" data-source="post: 535023" data-attributes="member: 14762"><p>My answer is "no". We adopted 2 bio siblings from Ukraine when they were 5 and 8, now 16 and almost 19. They have put us through hell. With no biological children, it's all about grief and loss for me. They manipulate and lie and cannot bond. It's been very hard. Can't wait for this job to be over.</p><p></p><p>I'm very glad I can be candid here and write exactly what I feel because it's totally anonymous.</p><p></p><p>This type of adoption should never be done without experience on the part of the would be adoptive parents. You need to really learn as much as you can before you even think about adopting children with these severe issues. The maternal drive however will make you think you can handle anything. But now I know, sadly, after it's too late, that thinking this way was very wrong.</p><p></p><p>Our "daughter" cannot hug us and will not open up emotionally. Our "son" didn't even think of calling or texting me for Mother's Day. He is no longer home with us and I expected at least something from him, even if it's awkward. So this is the reward after all the hell he's put us through. </p><p></p><p>Again NO!!! No is the answer.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CopingWithRad, post: 535023, member: 14762"] My answer is "no". We adopted 2 bio siblings from Ukraine when they were 5 and 8, now 16 and almost 19. They have put us through hell. With no biological children, it's all about grief and loss for me. They manipulate and lie and cannot bond. It's been very hard. Can't wait for this job to be over. I'm very glad I can be candid here and write exactly what I feel because it's totally anonymous. This type of adoption should never be done without experience on the part of the would be adoptive parents. You need to really learn as much as you can before you even think about adopting children with these severe issues. The maternal drive however will make you think you can handle anything. But now I know, sadly, after it's too late, that thinking this way was very wrong. Our "daughter" cannot hug us and will not open up emotionally. Our "son" didn't even think of calling or texting me for Mother's Day. He is no longer home with us and I expected at least something from him, even if it's awkward. So this is the reward after all the hell he's put us through. Again NO!!! No is the answer. [/QUOTE]
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Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS)/Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) parents - Would you adopt again?
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