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First Time Posting: Kicked son out and I just don't think I can handle this!
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 470650" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi there and another welcome to the board.</p><p></p><p>Yes, it is very hard to throw out a child, however your son is twenty-eight. He has had a long time to grow up, get a job, and at least treat you respectfully, and he didn't do it. I think it's well past the time he be forced to sink or swim on his own, or will he ever be able to do it? None of us can live forever. I am an older parent myself. </p><p></p><p>When my daughter spiraled out of control on drugs, we made her leave. She was lucky...her brother took her in under extremely strict rules and the threat that one screw up, even a cigarette, and she's OUT. Even so, the last thing she said to me was, "I will hate you FOREVER!" I didn't talk to her for over three weeks and I cried every single day. But you know what? SHE GREW UP! Her brother forced her to follow some really strict rules, including getting a job she could walk to and from (she didn't have a car) and cleaning up when she was home and cooking dinner (she learned to love cooking and went back to school to become a chef). She quit all her drugs and drinking and even cigarettes because she knew this was her very last chance and that her brother didn't get emotional or mess around or go soft like WE did. She is twenty-seven now, eight years drug free, great job, has her own house.</p><p></p><p>We can not take care of our k ids forever. They have to learn to make good choices or face the consequences. We are not BAD parents for not sheltering them forever. (((Hugs))) been there done that, and keep your chin up. Nobody should ever be disrespected in their own home. Concentrate on those who are good to you and cross your fingers that your son will seek out help to get a job, housing, rehab, etc. You can't do these things for him. He has to do them for himself.</p><p></p><p>I do suggest you go to an Al-Anon meeting for real life support. Sounds like he has a serious drinking problem and you can find a lot of great people at an Al-Anon meeting. I highly recommend it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 470650, member: 1550"] Hi there and another welcome to the board. Yes, it is very hard to throw out a child, however your son is twenty-eight. He has had a long time to grow up, get a job, and at least treat you respectfully, and he didn't do it. I think it's well past the time he be forced to sink or swim on his own, or will he ever be able to do it? None of us can live forever. I am an older parent myself. When my daughter spiraled out of control on drugs, we made her leave. She was lucky...her brother took her in under extremely strict rules and the threat that one screw up, even a cigarette, and she's OUT. Even so, the last thing she said to me was, "I will hate you FOREVER!" I didn't talk to her for over three weeks and I cried every single day. But you know what? SHE GREW UP! Her brother forced her to follow some really strict rules, including getting a job she could walk to and from (she didn't have a car) and cleaning up when she was home and cooking dinner (she learned to love cooking and went back to school to become a chef). She quit all her drugs and drinking and even cigarettes because she knew this was her very last chance and that her brother didn't get emotional or mess around or go soft like WE did. She is twenty-seven now, eight years drug free, great job, has her own house. We can not take care of our k ids forever. They have to learn to make good choices or face the consequences. We are not BAD parents for not sheltering them forever. (((Hugs))) been there done that, and keep your chin up. Nobody should ever be disrespected in their own home. Concentrate on those who are good to you and cross your fingers that your son will seek out help to get a job, housing, rehab, etc. You can't do these things for him. He has to do them for himself. I do suggest you go to an Al-Anon meeting for real life support. Sounds like he has a serious drinking problem and you can find a lot of great people at an Al-Anon meeting. I highly recommend it. [/QUOTE]
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First Time Posting: Kicked son out and I just don't think I can handle this!
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