Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
First Time Posting: Kicked son out and I just don't think I can handle this!
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="dollphyn" data-source="post: 470669" data-attributes="member: 13020"><p>I just want to thank you all so very very much for taking time out of your own to respond. I have tried to find an Al-anon meeting in my area, and there are a few, however, it is so difficult for me to go because of the hours and I have no one to stay with my mom during that time, It's just my husband and I. I have a step son, but he lives so far from here, my husband and I just basically depend on each other. I guess that is why I broke down and finally wrote on the board here. </p><p></p><p>I think my son just wants to go through life with no responsibility and just have fun at any expense. I'm not sure he cares what the consequences are or will be and that part scares me to death. Just about all his friends drink, but not quite like him..he has burnt his bridges with alot of them as well. </p><p></p><p>All I know is he cannot come back home. Like everyone in this predicament, I so wish there was another way...I wish I could just give him the car back, a few hundred dollars, maybe set him up in an apartment and pay a couple months of his rent for him...and then know that he would go out everyday - all day if need be - to find a job...BUT, deep down I know we would all be right back to where we are today...</p><p></p><p>My husband keeps reminding me of something that I know in my heart is true, but there is still that little hint of, "But Just Maybe"..he says that even if my son had finished school, he would not have looked for a job..he was going to school from 6pm to 11pm Mon thru Thur - if he wanted to work, he would have found a job where he could have worked during the day before his classes..he would have found a job in the medical assistance area because that is what he was going to school for. We even tried to get him to go down to the hospital district and Volunteer to gain some experience, some references, and to get a feeling of pride...but he never did that...</p><p></p><p>Just breaks my heart so bad...he is my only son. I have daughter that lives 10 hours from me..she has 2 children that are in their pre-teens now and they are involved in all kinds of activities...SO, I never get to see any of them anymore...she seen how my son was along time ago..she tried to tell me! We hardly ever talk anymore - I think maybe a great deal contributes to her resenting my son..they are half brother and sister. My step son is 2 years older than my son and he went straight into college from high school without skipping a beat. Got his Masters degree and is now working for the government..just bought his first house...he is avoiding my son as well.</p><p></p><p>Last week I thought about giving him one more chance, but only if he abide by a very strict contract and he was re-enrolled back into school..he could re-enroll and start where he left off...I called and talked with the school, they told me he could go in the morning form 7-12..that would have given me the opportunity to take him back and forth to school while my husband was still here to take care of my mom. I contacted him on facebook...I DID NOT tell him we were thinking about allowing him to come home and under what circumstances..I wanted to feel him out and see how serious he was about getting back into school, since I heard how bad he was talking about me for kicking him out right when he was almost done, and how bad he wanted to go back, and how bad he missed it...BUT as it turned out he did not show hardly any interest at all...so I knew to drop it...I think all his tralking about school, and how much of a *^)#$ I was for kicking him out right before he finished school was for pure drama and for sympathy.</p><p></p><p>I did find out that he is NOW staying with a friend of his across town about 20 miles from here. She is a hairdresser with 2 young kiddos and they have been friends for along time..just Platonic..I just wonder how long she will put up with him before he burns that bridge...then I wonder where he will go..I try to keep reminding myself he has the names and numbers of the missions downtown.</p><p></p><p>I will keep you all posted...I now know I have a place to come daily - and maybe eventually I can help someone down the line that is going to be in the same boat as me...I have been through more than I care to talk about in my years..but I got to say..this has got it all beat!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dollphyn, post: 470669, member: 13020"] I just want to thank you all so very very much for taking time out of your own to respond. I have tried to find an Al-anon meeting in my area, and there are a few, however, it is so difficult for me to go because of the hours and I have no one to stay with my mom during that time, It's just my husband and I. I have a step son, but he lives so far from here, my husband and I just basically depend on each other. I guess that is why I broke down and finally wrote on the board here. I think my son just wants to go through life with no responsibility and just have fun at any expense. I'm not sure he cares what the consequences are or will be and that part scares me to death. Just about all his friends drink, but not quite like him..he has burnt his bridges with alot of them as well. All I know is he cannot come back home. Like everyone in this predicament, I so wish there was another way...I wish I could just give him the car back, a few hundred dollars, maybe set him up in an apartment and pay a couple months of his rent for him...and then know that he would go out everyday - all day if need be - to find a job...BUT, deep down I know we would all be right back to where we are today... My husband keeps reminding me of something that I know in my heart is true, but there is still that little hint of, "But Just Maybe"..he says that even if my son had finished school, he would not have looked for a job..he was going to school from 6pm to 11pm Mon thru Thur - if he wanted to work, he would have found a job where he could have worked during the day before his classes..he would have found a job in the medical assistance area because that is what he was going to school for. We even tried to get him to go down to the hospital district and Volunteer to gain some experience, some references, and to get a feeling of pride...but he never did that... Just breaks my heart so bad...he is my only son. I have daughter that lives 10 hours from me..she has 2 children that are in their pre-teens now and they are involved in all kinds of activities...SO, I never get to see any of them anymore...she seen how my son was along time ago..she tried to tell me! We hardly ever talk anymore - I think maybe a great deal contributes to her resenting my son..they are half brother and sister. My step son is 2 years older than my son and he went straight into college from high school without skipping a beat. Got his Masters degree and is now working for the government..just bought his first house...he is avoiding my son as well. Last week I thought about giving him one more chance, but only if he abide by a very strict contract and he was re-enrolled back into school..he could re-enroll and start where he left off...I called and talked with the school, they told me he could go in the morning form 7-12..that would have given me the opportunity to take him back and forth to school while my husband was still here to take care of my mom. I contacted him on facebook...I DID NOT tell him we were thinking about allowing him to come home and under what circumstances..I wanted to feel him out and see how serious he was about getting back into school, since I heard how bad he was talking about me for kicking him out right when he was almost done, and how bad he wanted to go back, and how bad he missed it...BUT as it turned out he did not show hardly any interest at all...so I knew to drop it...I think all his tralking about school, and how much of a *^)#$ I was for kicking him out right before he finished school was for pure drama and for sympathy. I did find out that he is NOW staying with a friend of his across town about 20 miles from here. She is a hairdresser with 2 young kiddos and they have been friends for along time..just Platonic..I just wonder how long she will put up with him before he burns that bridge...then I wonder where he will go..I try to keep reminding myself he has the names and numbers of the missions downtown. I will keep you all posted...I now know I have a place to come daily - and maybe eventually I can help someone down the line that is going to be in the same boat as me...I have been through more than I care to talk about in my years..but I got to say..this has got it all beat! [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
First Time Posting: Kicked son out and I just don't think I can handle this!
Top