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The Watercooler
getting hit with the wishy washies again
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<blockquote data-quote="Big Bad Kitty" data-source="post: 155997" data-attributes="member: 3647"><p>Sweetie, I am going to be a broken record.</p><p></p><p>AL-ANON.</p><p></p><p>This is about YOU and how YOU feel about YOU. Right now, you are fretting at the thought of him being with someone else. If you were in a better place, you would be pushing him towards "someone else" saying "TAKE HIM!" And not worrying about whether or not you have a someone else.</p><p></p><p>Remember, you are still grieving the loss of a marriage, even if he did not die. It is the same concept. You grieve the <em>marriage</em> and what you once had the same way you would grieve the loss of a loved one if he died. Grieving comes in stages, and by the sounds of it, you are in the bargaining stage (I wonder, IF I had done this, THEN maybe that). There is NOTHING you could have done to have prevented his fall from grace. An addict is an addict. </p><p></p><p>One thing I heard that I have found to be relatively true is that it takes minimum of one month for every year that you were with someone to completely get over them. If you were with this guy for 18 years, don't count on getting over him for a year and a half. Know what I mean?? Grieving takes time.</p><p></p><p>and GET YOUR BUTT TO ALANON!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Big Bad Kitty, post: 155997, member: 3647"] Sweetie, I am going to be a broken record. AL-ANON. This is about YOU and how YOU feel about YOU. Right now, you are fretting at the thought of him being with someone else. If you were in a better place, you would be pushing him towards "someone else" saying "TAKE HIM!" And not worrying about whether or not you have a someone else. Remember, you are still grieving the loss of a marriage, even if he did not die. It is the same concept. You grieve the [I]marriage[/I] and what you once had the same way you would grieve the loss of a loved one if he died. Grieving comes in stages, and by the sounds of it, you are in the bargaining stage (I wonder, IF I had done this, THEN maybe that). There is NOTHING you could have done to have prevented his fall from grace. An addict is an addict. One thing I heard that I have found to be relatively true is that it takes minimum of one month for every year that you were with someone to completely get over them. If you were with this guy for 18 years, don't count on getting over him for a year and a half. Know what I mean?? Grieving takes time. and GET YOUR BUTT TO ALANON! [/QUOTE]
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getting hit with the wishy washies again
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