giving up custody to get help

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by dreamer, Mar 26, 2007.

  1. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    sometimes in the last couple months I had said something about some parents having to give up custody of their children so the kids could get help- I had said I found that truly sad and awful. SOme here posted back to me that I was wrong and that that did not ever happen.
    Well, now it is happening to someone here.........someone posted on the general forum. "worse. Now, I'm having to giv emy son up as a ward of the state in order to get help. "

    I find that to be so sad. I feel very bad for that parent. (and child)- the whole family.
  2. judi

    judi Active Member

    Yes, I totally agree.
  3. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    <span style='font-size: 11pt'>I'm not sure what it is you are trying to say, dreamer. We have had parents who have in desparation had to give up custody of their child for a variety of reasons. It is unfortunate and sad but sometimes it is the best choice in a bad situation. None of us know when we will be in a similar situation.
    I know enough to know that at any point in time, I will be in a situation that I never in a million years thought I would be in.

    I often think of the story of King Solomon. A true love will lose her child to save it's life. </span>
  4. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    WHat I am trying to say is ..........I am sad for them, I hurt on their behalf. I wish the system worked differently. Better. I would lose my child to save his life, too, but that does not mean it is not a sad thing.
  5. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    Been there, done that. It depends on the state you live in. For us, it was the last resort for help. Sadly, not much came from it, but it was just another thing on the checklist of things to try. Many more services open up when you do this. I wouldn't recommend it unless you are out of options.

  6. MeadowLark

    MeadowLark New Member

    I just discovered this post. That child is mine.
    Thankyou for caring. We have tried everything with in our ability for my son. We only have Medicaid in the state of S.C.
    We are currently waiting for the "shoe" to drop. That is; them telling us to come pick him up from the psychiatric hospital. and us not doing it. Then, the paperwork starts and I get charged with abandonment.
    Next, my son gets to become a ward of the state. It depends on the prosecuting atty. if they see it our way... we will get to call him, write letters, send birthday gifts, Christmas gifts and maybe even get to see him occasionally. I've heard that they may even work toward
    reuniting us as a family.

    I'm scared. My son knows what we are doing. He is in total agreement with us. He does not want to come home. He says it is too loud with his siblings etc.. a long list of complaints.
    We love our son. We want the best for him. We hurt.

    Today, I managed to get a brief call into him. I've tried to get ahold of the caseworker since last Thursday every day. I told him so. HE told me that she had tried to call us Monday. I was home and our cell phones were on... we got no calls. :frown: Either he lied to me or she lied to him. I don't know.

    I need a stronger rhino coat... some softer lining... more to lean on. My diabetis for now is out of control... I'm depressed.

    Still, Thankyou for caring. It warms my heart to know you are here for me.

    Huggles... and praying for the right things to happen.
  7. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    Oh my that sounds so harde. I am so sad for you. Best wishes. Lots of hugs.
  8. MeadowLark

    MeadowLark New Member

    He was officially abandoned this afternoon. God Please help us get help for him... and keep me from legal issues that I cannot handle.
  9. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Meadowlark, I am praying that help comes to your son and no legal issues arise for you. Take care of yourself. (((HUGS))) -RM
  10. momof4insc

    momof4insc New Member

    Meadowlark, I live in SC too and the resources here suck (to put it bluntly). My son's therapist wants to put him in group therapy, but there is none available here in Charleston. So, I feel you. Just be careful with this State, they love to lie to you. Case in point, SC DSS took 3 kids from a mother. Mother fought and regained custody of the 9 year old and the 11 year old autistic child. The 3 year old the state deemed she was unfit to have, terminated her parental rights, and adopted the 3 year old out. So, please make sure you have something in writing that you can be reunited as a family. SC also judicially kidnapped my child (long story), so I have no faith in the system here.
  11. MeadowLark

    MeadowLark New Member

    I just sent you a private pm Momof4insc. Please give me a holler. we're almost neighbors.