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Going crazy/need perspective/need to detach-Long
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<blockquote data-quote="Big Bad Kitty" data-source="post: 114180" data-attributes="member: 3647"><p>Older siblings, when starting a family, pull away from their younger siblings that they were once very close to (whether that younger sibling is a difficult child or not). Your older son does have a home of his own now, and has the right to be fastidious in it if he chooses. I agree with Fran that if you want to visit your new grandbaby, it should be about the grandbaby and not you and Lucas.</p><p></p><p>As far as your daughter goes, I have a different take on her situation than most. I think she should be encouraged to attend some AA meetings. Quitting on one's own is great and noteworthy but rarely works in the long run. The support she could get at those meetings and with a sponsor would give her th confidence she needs to stop dating loser guys and tell her father to lay off. Also, if she does not start to network with some AAs it si very likely that she will relapse. She needs a network and right now she has none. And mom, you can not save her.</p><p></p><p>Your 11 year old is 11. And 11 year old girls know everything. And their moms know nothing. Where were you when that memo was circulated?</p><p></p><p>You are most certainly on the pity pot. Go ahead and have a good cry. Grieving Scott is a must. Accepting your older son's detaching from your younger son is another must. The best help you could give your older daughter is to show her how to get the tools to help herself. And your little one, she's not doing anything wrong. She'll be back. They ALL come back.</p><p></p><p>Oh, and the "I'm broke" club? Welcome. We have jackets.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Big Bad Kitty, post: 114180, member: 3647"] Older siblings, when starting a family, pull away from their younger siblings that they were once very close to (whether that younger sibling is a difficult child or not). Your older son does have a home of his own now, and has the right to be fastidious in it if he chooses. I agree with Fran that if you want to visit your new grandbaby, it should be about the grandbaby and not you and Lucas. As far as your daughter goes, I have a different take on her situation than most. I think she should be encouraged to attend some AA meetings. Quitting on one's own is great and noteworthy but rarely works in the long run. The support she could get at those meetings and with a sponsor would give her th confidence she needs to stop dating loser guys and tell her father to lay off. Also, if she does not start to network with some AAs it si very likely that she will relapse. She needs a network and right now she has none. And mom, you can not save her. Your 11 year old is 11. And 11 year old girls know everything. And their moms know nothing. Where were you when that memo was circulated? You are most certainly on the pity pot. Go ahead and have a good cry. Grieving Scott is a must. Accepting your older son's detaching from your younger son is another must. The best help you could give your older daughter is to show her how to get the tools to help herself. And your little one, she's not doing anything wrong. She'll be back. They ALL come back. Oh, and the "I'm broke" club? Welcome. We have jackets. [/QUOTE]
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