And I'm praying it's as peaceful and recharging as I really need it to be. Between kids and FH and quitting smoking, and life in general, I am so done. Yeah, it's been almost 4 months that I quit smoking and I still feel like I'm in withdrawals (no, I didn't advertise it, so don't think you missed a post). I'm staying strong, but it's just........I can't describe it. Well, maybe, take your worst depression and multiply by 1000! I'm not going back, so I just have to get through. Put on a few pounds in the process. I'm so large as it is, I wish I could say it doesn't really show, but it really does. I've been [putting all my energies into NOT smoking that basic living stuff has gone the wayside, and I'm not good with keeping up with that in the first place. So, hopefully getting away and getting back to nature (going to a camp in Vermont) will rejuvenate my mind and spirit.