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Going out of my mind
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<blockquote data-quote="TeDo" data-source="post: 573217"><p>You really are in a pickle. Poor difficult child. husband is the one that needs to stop or walk away when he reaches his limit. That is HIS responsibility. He also needs to learn to pick his battles or HE is going to lose difficult child. Who and how to teach him that, I have no idea but it needs to happen soon. It would really hoover if it came down to you having to "choose" between husband and difficult child. YOU are good for difficult child. husband is NOT.</p><p></p><p>I don't think difficult child is doing anything on purpose and I really doubt he's taking any pleasure in being "abused" by husband. I really suggest you monitor and document the "timing" of the requests and how the request is made. What exactly is difficult child doing when make a request is made? What time of day and under what circumstances is the request made? Is he told or asked to do something? What tone of voice is used? Is he expected to drop what he's doing to comply with the request immediately? These are just some of the things that might show a pattern. You can even experiment with delivery methods and timing. Find something that works.</p><p></p><p> I would NOT rely on husband for much of anything, just to protect difficult child. It sounds like husband could use a therapist and/or psychiatrist of his own. {{{{(((HUGS)))}}} to you AND difficult child.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TeDo, post: 573217"] You really are in a pickle. Poor difficult child. husband is the one that needs to stop or walk away when he reaches his limit. That is HIS responsibility. He also needs to learn to pick his battles or HE is going to lose difficult child. Who and how to teach him that, I have no idea but it needs to happen soon. It would really hoover if it came down to you having to "choose" between husband and difficult child. YOU are good for difficult child. husband is NOT. I don't think difficult child is doing anything on purpose and I really doubt he's taking any pleasure in being "abused" by husband. I really suggest you monitor and document the "timing" of the requests and how the request is made. What exactly is difficult child doing when make a request is made? What time of day and under what circumstances is the request made? Is he told or asked to do something? What tone of voice is used? Is he expected to drop what he's doing to comply with the request immediately? These are just some of the things that might show a pattern. You can even experiment with delivery methods and timing. Find something that works. I would NOT rely on husband for much of anything, just to protect difficult child. It sounds like husband could use a therapist and/or psychiatrist of his own. {{{{(((HUGS)))}}} to you AND difficult child. [/QUOTE]
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