Going to have to talk to the vet....

[Hound dog]

I don't wanna. And I've been putting it off because I don't wanna. Selfish. I know. So for once in my life I'm being a little selfish.

But Maggie has her appoint wed, and I'm going to have a talk about Molly while we're there. doctor has been Molly's vet her entire life. I think I need some expert advice. And I want to talk to them before dragging her in there and stressing her to the max.

This has not been a good week. She's still eating ok. She's played with her ball, but she pays for it afterward. She's doing a lot of whimpering on and off. I've done a lot of brushing her to spend extra time with her. I'd play ball with her......but there is that whole afterward part, and she doesn't want to quit when I join and will literally try to play until she collapses.

She's gotten jumpy, really jumpy. This is NOT Maggie related because Maggie doesn't bother Molly at all. They go nose to nose and kiss........and that's about it. Maggie tried to snuggle Molly once......Molly was good about it. She didn't jump to the ceiling, but did ooch the tennis ball around to get Maggie's attention and distract her while she snuck away. She's "hiding" alot. Again not because of Maggie. This started before Maggie arrived. She's under and behind things like she's afraid to be bumped or something. The rapid panting has started up again.....but it's not when it's hot enough even for normal panting. Sometimes when she goes to sleep.........I have to really check to see if she's breathing because it's so darn shallow.

Something else that has gotten my attention as odd behavior...........

Normally when there is another animal in the house, Molly will eat their leftover food. She'll let them eat just fine.......but if they leave food, she eats it. She'll pick up their bones (theirs are always better than hers) and chew them. (she'll do this with cat food too which is why it's up on the table all the time) She's not so much as sniffed at Maggie's food........nor gone near her bone. I find it odd because it's not normal behavior for her, AND because c'mon, puppyfood is tiny kibble and I've softened it and honestly it's probably easier for her to eat it than her own. (can food gave her the trots, had to switch back to dry with broth)

Brushing her.......... She now has 2 tumors, the one on her chest which is getting larger but seems to be growing not so fast. And a new one probably left lower quadrant area that is quite large and new........and discoloring her skin.......and tender.....and will make her jump like a rabbit if you get near it. The one on her chest had me worried. The new one.......has me alarmed because it's relatively huge and it wasn't there long ago. She has lost a lot of weight in the last 9 months.....so when it was smaller I could've missed it due to extra skin.

There is the teeth issue. I was going to talk to the vet to find out the cost of having the broken bad ones removed to stop the pain in that area if it wasn't too expensive. (I've not idea what it would cost) Having the procedure might stress her to the max, but the benefit if it isn't too expensive would be worth it. BUT there is the goopy awful cough......and I dunno if she has the lung function to survive anesthetic to have her teeth pulled.

Other than the initial greeting of Maggie and the playing with her with the hedgehog (Molly's way of saying welcome to the family kid), she makes no effort to have anything to do with her. This is also highly out of character. Molly LOVES babies.

Molly also hovers near me all the time. She has to sleep in whatever room I'm in. After a particularly nasty coughing fit (or sometimes in the middle of one) she comes to me for comfort. Breaks my heart.

If vet wants to examine her before giving me advice, I guess I'll take her in. But at this stage, when I know already I can't afford anything extensive.....and at her age don't really feel it's kind to do so........I really hate to stress her out if I don't have to.

Nichole's husband has volunteered to be with Molly should she have to be put down and I just can't do it myself. Nice of him, really. But I'm having issues with the whole "put down" thing, some really bad ones. Heh, and I always thought myself to be so practical about the issue of quality of life vs just being there because someone can't bare the thought of parting with you...... Obviously I'm more selfish than I thought.

When/if the time comes to put her down, I hope I can be brave enough to spend her last moments with her. That my face is what she sees as she slips to the other side. But there will probably have to be someone to literally carry me out of the office, I might not make it under my own power.

But I just can't imagine my life without my Molly girl in it...............and while it's only been 12 yrs, it seems as if she's been here forever.

 

[InsaneCdn]

Oh, Lisa. Many, many {{hugs}}.
Just reading that brings back memories of when we had to, and...
{{hugs}}

Sending strength and calm and wisdom...

 

[SuZir]

I'm so sorry!

That is always the worse part in having a pet. Thinking, worrying and knowing time is quickly running out and you are in for very difficult decisions. It just hurts so much. Just remember that afterwards it is easier to look back, when you know, that you didn't keep them waiting for letting them go too long.

Hugs

 

[AnnieO]

Oh, Lisa, sweetie...

I think Molly is trying to tell you it's time, honey. I think you also already know that. Your post reminded me of the last week or so with Weasel... I knew but I didn't WANT to know.

The vet IS going to want to examine her... But honestly, most good ones, you can talk to them beforehand like you are planning to do, and they'll make that other appointment to be an either/or. An exam and, if necessary, that final shot.

The day we put Weasel to sleep, husband and I went into the room with her... Mom and Dad waited out in the waiting room... doctor came in and gave her the first shot, the one that literally put her to sleep so she would not feel the other. We said goodbye... Then he came and got her, and Mom said when he took her to the back for the final shot he was cradling her like the most precious child. As long as he is in practice he will see my furkids...

Hugs, sweetie.

 

[donna723]

There is always that heartbreaking down-side to having pets! The vet will be able to tell you if she will be able to handle the sedation. With mine, they did bloodwork first to see how everything was functioning. My Ragan is almost ten and Katy is almost eight - both had surgery recently and did great! Infected teeth can be horribly painful. And at her age, she probably has arthritis too which is also very painful for them but there's medications that can help a lot. I wouldn't give up on her yet unless the vet advises it. It could be that with medications for the arthritis and without the pain and infection from the dental problems, she would feel a whole lot better and have a new lease on life! You never know!!

 

[KTMom91]

Just hugs. It's such a hard decision.

 

[BloodiedButUnbowed]

I am so very sorry for what you are going through. I lost two cats within two years of each other. Both old as dirt but it's never enough time. My first went naturally, but I did have to make "the decision" for the second. I was out of town so I could not be with her, which made it even worse for me. What comforted me, and what I hope will comfort you, is that if it's the right thing to do for your pet, the anxiety/fear/dread will leave you and be replaced by a calm sense of knowing you are doing the last loving thing you can do for your pet. You'll know it's time when you feel that way.

Again, my condolences and very best wishes for you and your family (human and otherwise).

 

[Marcie Mac]

So sorry Lisa. My dogs are getting older and I don't even wanna think about the prospects. My boys think both SO and I lost our minds when Maggs and Mama's got into a fight with Maggs getting the worst of it. The vet bill was outrageous for the fight, then right afterward when we were going to bring Maggs home, her stomach twisted and she had to have an operation. Then we had to take her to the emergency vet as she had a problem and couldn't breathe-she had a resperatory infection - It was about 1,000 just for her spending the night there. I could have paid off a third of the new car we just bought with what we have paid off in the past two months alone in vet bills. At 11 years old, she has bad arthuritis, and gets joint pills daily and vitamins- we try and make sure she doesn't hurt too badly, but comming to terms that she is not going to live for many more years is so hard as she is so much a part of the family.

They give so much happiness and ask for so little back in return

Marcie

 

[DammitJanet]

Lisa for your sake, I hope you wake up one morning and find that she has just passed in her sleep. That happened to one of our cats. He had been acting sick quite a bit and kept wanting to sit on Jamie's lap. Yeah he was Jamie's cat. One night he slept with Jamie all night long then after we left for school and work the cat went into the bathroom and curled up and went to sleep forever. Im sure so we didnt have to make the decision. Now of course, we wont ever have to go to a vet, we have our own person who can do that in the family.

 

[susiestar]

(((((hugs)))))

Is it possible the new lump is an abscess that is getting worse and straining her system? they are sometimes hard like tumors. One thing that could really help her lungs is to get a nebulizer like they use for asthma and use saline in it. Have it blow at her face is possible. You can use zip ties or twister seals (like the ties on bread bags that you bend and twist) to fasten the mouth tube to a chair leg or something similar.

I know this gave a few of our pets some relief when they were coughing a lot. It won't keep the vet from needing to do whatever is needed, but it could help make her more comfortable. But only use saline in it. You can use the kind for lungs, which is expensive, or just get a bottle of saline for contacts. Use a new bottle every week.

(((((hugs)))))

 

[Mom2oddson]

Lisa.... many hugs. We just went through this with Annie on Monday. My heart goes out to you. It's a brutal decision, one that has you second guessing yourself over and over.

Mason was having failure to thrive (losing weight no matter how much he ate). We didn't want to end his life. He was still wagging is tail. He was still coming to get petted. He seemed to still be "Okay". But the loss of weight finally led to seisures. Some very painful ones too.

So, when Annie was having failure to thrive, we watched her. She didn't like to move much so she'd lay out in the rain until we made her come in. She still wagged her tail, she still ate, she was still so dang happy to see us. But we didn't want her to suffer like Mason.

If you do come to that decision, have sister in law go with you and be the one to carry you out. Being there for your loved one is a wonderful gift to them. Annie left us while her head was in husband's lap. Steph and I were on each side and all the other fur babies were around her too.

Didn't mean to make this about me. Just wanted to let you know that I understand. It took husband and I two months to finally decide that enough was enough. You and Molly are in my prayers and in my heart.

 

[Hound dog]

Mom 2, you didn't make it all about you. It helps when others talk about their experience because this is my first with an elderly much loved/adored family member.

Despite eating Molly has lost considerable weight. It's how I know she tends to hold fluid once in a while.........because she couldn't possibly gain it back like that. Know what I mean?? She's lost even though I long long ago stopped worrying about how much table scraps she was getting. (used to be I had to keep her strictly limited because she was very over weight) I can't blame her teeth for that because she IS eating, and eating plenty........actually eating more than enough to make her obese again. But she's not putting the pounds back on.

I know if it isn't time yet, it's getting very close. But yeah, I'm 2nd guessing.........and 3rd guessing.......

 

[Mom2oddson]

It sounds like Molly is suffering from "Failure to Thrive", we've had 3 animals do that. It's just their body shutting down. There is nothing you can do for them. The thing to watch out for is that if they get too thin, they will have seisures. And they will be violent ones at the end. That is what happened to Mason. So, when Annie started to Fail to thrive we just watched her and didn't let her get to that point.

I've been there for at the end for four dogs now. It's hard, but I'm glad I was there. I was able to tell Buddy thank you for all the love and support he had given me. He had been my rock through the heck I went through with my ex. And he was easy child's big brother. I was able to tell Mason that I loved him and thanks him for all the laughs and exercise he gave me. And to apologize for letting him get too sick. And for Annie, I just gave her as much love as I could pour into her to thank her for all the love she gave me.

I lucked out finding a vet that will come to the house so that we could all be at home to say good bye. It's about an extra $60 then going to the vet but it was so worth it for us. If you do go to the vets, see if they will let you do it outside away from the office setting. It will make it less clinical.

My heart goes out to you. Just love Molly every second. {{{HUGS}}}