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Grandparent Denial Issues
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 183982" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>Your mother in law grew up in an era that mental health issues were taboo. Everything was hush hush. Familys were looked down upon if there was someone in the home with a mental health issue. They were not diagnosed or medicated - they just had to live with it. And although her generation started to bring these issues into the public realm, not all people of her generation are still willing to get on board. Their upbringing has instituded a fear about this. This is why I was so hesitant to tell my parents about difficult child's struggles. I just didn't know how they would react.</p><p> </p><p>I knew someone once who would refuse to step foot on the state hospital grounds - she was so afraid of the residents and she was from my generations. So even today, there are lots of people who are afraid and do not understand. </p><p> </p><p>The fears and misunderstandings are still out there. I think your mother in law is trying but finds it extremely hard to change the thoughts she grew up with. And then she discusses what she has learned with others of her own generation and they go off on the little info they grew up with which is totally wrong. </p><p> </p><p>Since she has talked to her friends and most likely given and received wrong information, maybe you can have a group meeting with all of them and put them all straight. There may be one in the group that will understand and be able to turn the others around.</p><p> </p><p>I usually would not recommend a group talk on your difficult child's struggles, however, if there is wrong info out that will effect how difficult child is being looked at, I think it would be o.k. to do so in this situation.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 183982, member: 5096"] Your mother in law grew up in an era that mental health issues were taboo. Everything was hush hush. Familys were looked down upon if there was someone in the home with a mental health issue. They were not diagnosed or medicated - they just had to live with it. And although her generation started to bring these issues into the public realm, not all people of her generation are still willing to get on board. Their upbringing has instituded a fear about this. This is why I was so hesitant to tell my parents about difficult child's struggles. I just didn't know how they would react. I knew someone once who would refuse to step foot on the state hospital grounds - she was so afraid of the residents and she was from my generations. So even today, there are lots of people who are afraid and do not understand. The fears and misunderstandings are still out there. I think your mother in law is trying but finds it extremely hard to change the thoughts she grew up with. And then she discusses what she has learned with others of her own generation and they go off on the little info they grew up with which is totally wrong. Since she has talked to her friends and most likely given and received wrong information, maybe you can have a group meeting with all of them and put them all straight. There may be one in the group that will understand and be able to turn the others around. I usually would not recommend a group talk on your difficult child's struggles, however, if there is wrong info out that will effect how difficult child is being looked at, I think it would be o.k. to do so in this situation. [/QUOTE]
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