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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Harsh words and a tough order-how do we play this?
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 22099" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Are you sure he will say those things to you or are you projecting your fears of what he may say? </p><p></p><p>Often times what we fear the kids may do is not what they really do. For instance, I have feared my son would hold our grandchild hostage and blackmail us with her. He hasnt even thought about it as far as I know. I told him point blank before she was born that I wouldnt ever be held by that. Not to even try that with me. I love her but I wont be blackmailed. </p><p></p><p>When my son was in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) he made the choice for us not to drive up to visit him if he didnt have the level to go off campus for his visits. That is basically the policy they are asking your son to do. We never sent our son care packages. It wasnt allowed. He did get an allowance and his grandfather sent him ten bucks for his birthday which was put on his account and he could buy snacks. If he needed clothing, the center told us and we had to have them approved. </p><p></p><p>I would simply be very noncommittal with him and tell him you know he can work the program. You have faith in his good decisions. You hope to see him soon. </p><p></p><p>Sue has some good answers.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 22099, member: 1514"] Are you sure he will say those things to you or are you projecting your fears of what he may say? Often times what we fear the kids may do is not what they really do. For instance, I have feared my son would hold our grandchild hostage and blackmail us with her. He hasnt even thought about it as far as I know. I told him point blank before she was born that I wouldnt ever be held by that. Not to even try that with me. I love her but I wont be blackmailed. When my son was in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) he made the choice for us not to drive up to visit him if he didnt have the level to go off campus for his visits. That is basically the policy they are asking your son to do. We never sent our son care packages. It wasnt allowed. He did get an allowance and his grandfather sent him ten bucks for his birthday which was put on his account and he could buy snacks. If he needed clothing, the center told us and we had to have them approved. I would simply be very noncommittal with him and tell him you know he can work the program. You have faith in his good decisions. You hope to see him soon. Sue has some good answers. [/QUOTE]
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Substance Abuse
Harsh words and a tough order-how do we play this?
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