In the almost-7 years since I came here, have seen a lot of folks come and go. Some need us for a short time while others are in it for the long haul. I hope that his absence means things are working out for the better for him and his family.
Yes...like Judi said...I hope his absence means Mr. McWeedy has turned his life around. There are only a handful of the old timers that still hang on here...lol. If you can believe it, I came here when Cory was 12! I have seen so many come and go. I hang around because this place is home to me. I dont know where else I could go that would understand me and the boys...and still love us. I guess if all the oldies but goodies left I would too but since they keep hanging in there...Im here.
I hope it's "no news is good news" too, although I don't much believe that teenagers have the desire or brain cells to actually turn their lives around since they know for a fact that it's not THEIR problem but OUR problem.
I'm so glad that the old-timers here continue to stick around to help--I don't know what I would have done without you all. I'm quite certain that I'll be needing your sage advice again and again...
I too hope that things are better with Mikeys family.
I have been coming to the board for almost 7 years now. I took a break for a couple of years on and off when times were really tough..it was just too hard to post.
Even though Sweet Betsy is almost 19 and doing so much better, this is still like a family to me. I lurk alot and pray for each family. I think I will still be coming here for years to come...you guys have become my friends.
Let's see. I have been here since May 11, 2004. difficult child was 15 at the time. I lurk a lot and post when I have time and the energy. I have become so used to seeing ya'll frequently that I have to check in everyday and make sure everyone is okay. In my 3 1/2 years I have see a lot of people come and go---some of use will probably be here until the end.
I hope that Mikey and McWeedy are okay--but from experience I know that probably isn't the case. Until I truely detached sometimes being on this site hurt too much! Other times I was just to digusted with difficult child to try to offer support or comfort to someone else.
Mikey, if you're out there, we will be here when you need us.
I, like so many of you have said, consider this my family. I am here....4 years. There have been plenty of times I could not post, usually the bad times. I think that Mikey isn't ready to accept some of the advice we have offered. I know that it took me a long time to accept and adapt the same advice I was offered. My guess is that he is contemplating everthing he's been told and is somehow thinking it doesn't really apply to him, or he's not ready to do certain things yet.....We have all been there.
Mikey, just know that you can come here for whatever support you want, and you don't have to take our suggestions if you are not ready too. Each person has to decide what and when the time is right for them. Please come back, I miss the stories filled with wit, sarcasm and charm.
Melissa - I think you may have hit the nail on the head: Mikey may not be able to come to terms with our advice. I know when I first started here my son was 15 and hospitalized for the first time. I cried every day! Then...when I wasn't so self-absorbed, I realized some folks had been here years and had "kids" in their 20's and 30's and they still were difficult child's!!
That was even more disheartening - that this might be my life! Now, my son is 22. Yes...he is still definitely a difficult child!
For me, this was the hardest thing to come to terms with! I hope that Mikey has peace in his heart with his decisions.
I've been here since 2001. Wow, I was really hoping to be gone by now. I came when Eeyore was struggling. Now I stay because of Kanga and Tigger. There are times when I need to avoid the board because I can't handle the glimpses of the future...hope Mikey is okay.
Yes, he may not be up to the adivse of the board members. When I came here, Sweet Betsy was 12. I was at my wits end and didn't really know what to do next. At first it was hard to hear the "real truth" from those who had been there done that. I could NEVER put my child in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC), I wasn't that kind of mother. Within a year she was 400 miles away in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for a year.
Everyone, espicially the "old timers" helped me tremendously.
But it was Fran who took the firm stand with me, in her motherly sort of way. She made me realize that this was not about ME and I would survive the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) year if I truly wanted what was best for Betsy. Her words really turned my life around and I still consider her advice some of the best I've received in my life.
All of you helped me so much. I had beat on every door known to man trying to get help for my daughter. But no one ever gave me a clue how I was to survive thru it all. You guys did. I realized I wasn't doing my best for Betsy, since I was floundering so much myself. You guys helped me change that.
I think I will always be around. I too check in everyday to see how things are going and although I don't always post, I pray for everyone here on a daily basis...My Board Family.
Hope everyone has a wonderful, meltdown free weekend.
I to have been here for quite awhile and the support I received and still receive has been a life saver for me. Part of the reason I had stopped posting was because of something quite critical someone said to me that I was unemotionally able to deal with at that time. The other reason was because I was so depressed and felt so hopeless I just... anyway, I was and am a daily lurker. I check the board often. I am even posting again now that things are better and I feel stronger.
I read a lot of Mikey's posts and a lot of the responses. To be honest sometime I felt some of the responses were quite brutal. When that happened to me, and it was just one person that pm'd me, it caused me to doubt myself so much I quit posting for almost two years. I felt I had nothing of value to offer. I was so depressed I just couldn't deal with that. I was always here tho, I never left I got to attached to all you guys and needed to know everyone was ok.
I hope Mikey and his family are doing well and I to hope to see him post again. Maybe him seeing that we have not forgotten about him and we do care will inspire him :smile:
I'm so very sorry if you felt badly when you first posted. I usually notice and PM the person, so if I didn't PM you, I'm sorry. I'm usually one who tells people that everyone has to do what they feel they can live with.
I'm so glad to hear that things are going better for you and yours, and it's been nice seeing you back.
You have always been wonderful and I always take your words to heart. You wouldn't have known about it because it was via pm. I'm fine now, you have always been very supportive of me as has pretty much everyone here. It probably wouldn't have gotten to me under normal circumstances but at that time as with most newbies that come here, my state of mind was very fragile. I just didn't handle it well. I'm much better now and I owe a lot of my progress to all of the board members. This is a fantastic group .
As for you Melissa what can I say? You have always been my friend here. You have pm'd me numerous times just to see if I am ok and it please me that at least some areas of your life are happier times for you. If I ever made it to your neck of the woods, we'd definitely have to do coffee :laugh:
This is a wonderful group of ppl that I think quite highly of and could never imagine not being a part of. Even if I do just lurk most of the time :wink:
Me too I hope Mikey is alright. Also, I don't think Mikey is ready for you guys advise yet.
It is amazing how long you guys have been here!!!! I have to say your advise has TOTALLY helped me to cope and to make the right decisions on how to handle difficult child. He has not talked to me since i've kicked him out. Three weeks now. He called husband this morning and asked if he could come home. He is living in an appartment on his own but doesn't have the money for electric. husband told him he could as soon as he could pass a drug test. And this will be our last time to let him come home. If and when we allow him home it will be the forth and last time. And husband will not let him home so long as he is treating me this way.
I don't know what I would have done without you guys. I luke alot also and pray for all of you every day!! I appreciate you so very much. Thank you.
Your teens transition home from a residential treatment program is extremely important to his success. Transition is how we come to terms with dramatic change in our lives and it does not "just happen" because he completed a program. That expectation will set him up for failure ..... quickly.