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I opted out of the Norman Rockwell (not) holiday gatherings many years ago. I do not do well with extended family drama. I have enough of it in my own nuclear family. I used to gather with my family of choice ( friends who felt the same way) and had a blast. My son enjoyed these non judgmental gatherings. His behavior, lack of scholastic success, and my obvious poor parenting, were not the table conversation. Let them find someone else to dissect. My son did not suffer from lack of family contact.


I now spend my holidays with my favorite person- me. I go somewhere nice or not.


Your younger son wanting to visit with family is understandable. I think that you are taking the high road by putting yourself in an uncomfortable situation. If your family refuses to see JT for what he is so be it. Sisters are highly overrated. If she were not your sister, would you want a relationship with her?


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