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<blockquote data-quote="janebrain" data-source="post: 147551" data-attributes="member: 3208"><p>Stands, </p><p>your son played both you and the ministry man. The ministry man is disappointed--well, I think your son told him everything he wanted to hear in order to get out of jail. I don't think he ever had any real intentions of working a program. You have got to quit second guessing everything--you still are in the mindset that there is something you could have done differently to make your son change. Once you can really let go of that false notion you will be so much better off. If you can come to the realization that you did everything you could and there is/was nothing you could do to change the outcome you will be able to truly detach and let your son's problems be his own.</p><p></p><p>I feel frustrated because this "kid" is 24 years old and you still seem to think he is about 12 or 13! He needs to grow up and you need to let him! As someone else said, there are soup kitchens, homeless shelters, etc. Also, it is Spring, he won't even freeze to death! He will manage and he may decide he doesn't want to live like that anymore. He will never be able to decide as long as he knows he has a family who won't take away the safety net. You really do need to get seriously angry about all his manipulations so you can have the strength to say no to him.</p><p></p><p>Sincerely,</p><p>Jane</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="janebrain, post: 147551, member: 3208"] Stands, your son played both you and the ministry man. The ministry man is disappointed--well, I think your son told him everything he wanted to hear in order to get out of jail. I don't think he ever had any real intentions of working a program. You have got to quit second guessing everything--you still are in the mindset that there is something you could have done differently to make your son change. Once you can really let go of that false notion you will be so much better off. If you can come to the realization that you did everything you could and there is/was nothing you could do to change the outcome you will be able to truly detach and let your son's problems be his own. I feel frustrated because this "kid" is 24 years old and you still seem to think he is about 12 or 13! He needs to grow up and you need to let him! As someone else said, there are soup kitchens, homeless shelters, etc. Also, it is Spring, he won't even freeze to death! He will manage and he may decide he doesn't want to live like that anymore. He will never be able to decide as long as he knows he has a family who won't take away the safety net. You really do need to get seriously angry about all his manipulations so you can have the strength to say no to him. Sincerely, Jane [/QUOTE]
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