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He lost it tonight
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 119070" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #000000">Part of the problem is that I can't tell when he's practicing if it's the typical mumbling and grumbling or if he's really that frustrated. And, the only things he has to sell are this year's Christmas and birthday presents. If we have to buy the trumpet (because it can't be repaired to mint condition) selling these gifts used will not cover it. You bet, he's going to think he's paid for it whether or not it can really cover all the cost. It is very tempting to say 'you just bought yourself a trumpet, at the cost of this year's gifts', which is about all I can do. OTHO, my gut feeling is that it could backfire. It's like he feels more comfortable screwing up. I had a ed spec tell me that he needs to learn what living 'normal' feels like- because he's been in so much trouble.</span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #000000">Yes, I want him to stay in band, although I didn't push him to join and I didn't choose the instrument- he did. But it is very good for him and it has lead him to try teaching himself to play piano (we only have a small one, but he still likes it). </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #000000">I'm not sure about the lithobid- it completely stopped raging for the first 6-8 weeks. Then, there were signs of raging coming back, but he was able to keep himself reeled in and stop it from getting out of control. I couldn't tell if lithobid was gradually becoming ineffective or if it was still doing anything. I just raised him back to normal dosage of it tonight (he's stayed on regular dosage of depakote through this). If raging doesn't come back, I have to believe it's the lithobid. If it does, then the lithobid is no longer effective. What makes this sticky is a sticky diagnosis. One psychiatrist thinks it's clearly all cycling, although questionable if it's prozac induced. Another psychiatrist thinks yes, he's cycling, but his bigger problem is depression and he needs to be on an AD with a mood stabilizer to keep manic reactions under control. He is currently not on an AD. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #000000">And to make it worse, my difficult child is usually fairly close to being a easy child from April until December. From Jan. through March, he has been out of control- actually, it's like he can't control himself- this will be the third year we've gone through this. It's so bad, if it happens this year, he will be out of home and mainstream school- by order of the court. So, I guess I don't think he's on the right medication mix yet. At least, this trial should make it obvious if lithobid is even helping with rage at all at this point. - it should also help him see what medications are helping him keep under control. If it is helping, I will reduce or eliminate his punishment .</span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #000000">And now that I read my own post- if he can't control it, then being on the wrong medication mix isn't reason to hold him fully accountable. on the other hand, he has to make some effort here- I do think he takes advantage of (and tries to manipulate) the "I can't help it" portion of this.</span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 119070, member: 3699"] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#000000]Part of the problem is that I can't tell when he's practicing if it's the typical mumbling and grumbling or if he's really that frustrated. And, the only things he has to sell are this year's Christmas and birthday presents. If we have to buy the trumpet (because it can't be repaired to mint condition) selling these gifts used will not cover it. You bet, he's going to think he's paid for it whether or not it can really cover all the cost. It is very tempting to say 'you just bought yourself a trumpet, at the cost of this year's gifts', which is about all I can do. OTHO, my gut feeling is that it could backfire. It's like he feels more comfortable screwing up. I had a ed spec tell me that he needs to learn what living 'normal' feels like- because he's been in so much trouble.[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#000000]Yes, I want him to stay in band, although I didn't push him to join and I didn't choose the instrument- he did. But it is very good for him and it has lead him to try teaching himself to play piano (we only have a small one, but he still likes it). [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#000000]I'm not sure about the lithobid- it completely stopped raging for the first 6-8 weeks. Then, there were signs of raging coming back, but he was able to keep himself reeled in and stop it from getting out of control. I couldn't tell if lithobid was gradually becoming ineffective or if it was still doing anything. I just raised him back to normal dosage of it tonight (he's stayed on regular dosage of depakote through this). If raging doesn't come back, I have to believe it's the lithobid. If it does, then the lithobid is no longer effective. What makes this sticky is a sticky diagnosis. One psychiatrist thinks it's clearly all cycling, although questionable if it's prozac induced. Another psychiatrist thinks yes, he's cycling, but his bigger problem is depression and he needs to be on an AD with a mood stabilizer to keep manic reactions under control. He is currently not on an AD. [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#000000]And to make it worse, my difficult child is usually fairly close to being a easy child from April until December. From Jan. through March, he has been out of control- actually, it's like he can't control himself- this will be the third year we've gone through this. It's so bad, if it happens this year, he will be out of home and mainstream school- by order of the court. So, I guess I don't think he's on the right medication mix yet. At least, this trial should make it obvious if lithobid is even helping with rage at all at this point. - it should also help him see what medications are helping him keep under control. If it is helping, I will reduce or eliminate his punishment .[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#000000]And now that I read my own post- if he can't control it, then being on the wrong medication mix isn't reason to hold him fully accountable. on the other hand, he has to make some effort here- I do think he takes advantage of (and tries to manipulate) the "I can't help it" portion of this.[/COLOR][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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