He wont quit eating!!!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by tinamarie1, Sep 4, 2009.

  1. tinamarie1

    tinamarie1 Member

    My difficult child eats constantly. He sneaks food behind my back and its driving me crazy. Yesterday he ate 4 little debbie cakes. What am I supposed to do about this? He has been off concerta over the summer and I guess now I am paying for it? I can't afford to go to the store every 5 days because hes eating us out of house and home. I buy snacks for hubby and easy child but it seems they won't be able to have any because of difficult child not having any self control. He thinks a healthy breakfast is bacon, eggs and waffles. I leave the room for 10 minutes and he's in the kitchen making a huge mess and cooking all the food! I had bought bacon because we have company coming this weekend. Gahhh!
  2. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Was he very thin while taking Concerta?
    Has he gained a lot of weight over the summer?
    Is he in a growth spurt?
    Will he go back on Concerta once school starts again?

    It is true that Concerta suppresses appetite and then kids make up for loss of appetite once they are off of it. The only options you have are to make healthy choices available to him or lock up food you don't want him to have.
  3. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    If he's like my son, he's trying to make up for lost calories that he's not getting during the day because he's simply not getting those hunger cues. Smallworld's suggestions are exactly what I would recommend.

    The only thing I'd add is that we resigned ourselves to our son needing to eat at later times than the rest of us. And since my difficult child is on the thin side to begin with, I'd rather see him eating a yogurt or a sandwich or apple or soup or whatever at midnight because he's hungry than push him to eat with the rest of the family when he's not hungry. It just sets him up for eating problems later on, in my opinion.

    If your difficult child is willing to cook for himself, so much the better! That's a life skill he needs to learn anyway. You'll have to tolerate a little messiness until you can train him to clean up after himself, which may take some time, but the end result will be a self-sufficient kid :) . You probably need to sit down with him and talk about how he needs to communicate with you when he's hungry so that if there's something you've bought for a special occasion that he knows not to use it. Or better yet, put a bright-colored post-in note on the item that declares it off limits to help him remember.

    Help him come up with a list of acceptable menu items that he can make for himself so he knows what he's allowed to do. And then reinforce the hows and whys of him cleaning up his mess when he's done. Maybe even make a menu and cleanup list as a visual reminder and post it in the kitchen. Have him help you create the lists so that he has more ownership of it. And then be prepared for slip-ups and mistakes, but know that you're doing what you can to help him learn what's expected in your house.

    It's hard, frustrating work parenting these kids, but the rewards can be huge.
  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    We buy turkey bacon instead of pork bacon, and we don't buy any prepackaged sugary things like Little Debbies.
    My husband just recently figured out he can't buy difficult child's "reward candy" in bulk any more, and if he does, he has to keep it at the ofc. (Reeses and Twix)
    Age 10 is a growing age and for boys, it's only going to get worse between now and 21.
    I remember one of my sisters telling me how her son ate the family's dinner one night. By himself. (I think it's funny that she complained, because out of all 5 of us, while growing up, she was the one who ate the most.)
    My brother used to come home from dates and scarf down an entire box of cereal. I'd get up in the a.m. and there would be nothing for me to eat. :(

    I agree with-the menu planning idea, too.
    Best of luck!
  5. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    It's not just boys. Between the ages of 10 and 11, I shot up nearly 8" in height. Not only could I not get out of my own way, but I ate my family out of house and home! We didn't have "junk food" in the house and growing up Kosher, in those days short of stopping at a kosher deli, there wasn't really any sort of fast food.

    I can remember eating most of a whole roasted chicken on my own, accompanied by a big baked potato and a huge serving of salad or other veggies.

    For a few years I thought my mother actually preferred chicken necks and backs. Turns out that when does eat chicken she prefers the breast.

    These days she is mostly vegetarian, my sister is fully vegetarian, and I've got a vegan niece and nephew.

    I was a vegetarian for a few years, but had major problems with anemia and wound up going back to eating meat.

    I still eat very little red meat, but I like pork and I love fish.
  6. Chubbysanta

    Chubbysanta Sad Dad

    If he is like my son he may have binge eating disorder or pradar-willis syndrome I had to put locks on my fridge and all the cupboards so he couldn't get into them. also i had to put an alarm on his door because he would sneak out at night to raid the kitchen.
  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    While most kids that age do start to eat large amounts, it can be a sign of a problem.

    Sometimes the child is just too hungry or the treat too tempting to resist.

    But they may be eating for other reasons. If he has a gnawing hunger that drives him to eat almost constantly he should be examined for gastritis or an ulcer. Esp if he is on medications as many medications can contribute to these problems.

    You can usually add prilosec (omeprazole generic) or zantac (sold as acid reducer at Walmart) and it may help.

    Locking cabinets and even a chain on the frige may be needed. If there is food for a specific purpose make sure you can keep it locked in your room or another room. If needed move the refrigerator and freezer to a room you can put a dead bolt on.

    ALL moms of boys go through this to some degree, but moms of difficult children deal with a whole lot more of it and greater degrees of it.

    Just make sure there are some healthy pref lower calorie or no wasted calorie food he can munch on. 5 lb bags of carrots last less than 3 days with Jess and thank you. I get ranch in the gallon size for $7 at walmart or $6 at Sams and it lasts maybe 3-4 weeks. Just rmember to keep ready to eat fruits and veggies around in quantity.
  8. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    Just don't let him in the kitchen to make anything. Don't let him eat, do whatever you can, give him a normal meal at the normal times and say no to anything else. I know it's hard! And know he will still try to sneak and steal money to buy food at school, or wherever. Know this- your dilligence will pay off in the fact that he won't be as heavy as he would with you ignoring the situation. Will he still be heavy? Most likely, but you have him living in your house and you can control a lot, while hopefully teaching him good eating habits. My difficult child was like this, and it was a serious bone of contention- he would eat when we were out , whenever, but when he left home he was 200- now he's about 300. It's sad, I did all I could, you do all you can. That's it. I know how you feel, it's disturbing to us as mothers. I always want to say something about his weight, but now that he's not living here, I never, ever do. I love him and don't want him to hate me. When he was living here, he was very, very violent. I can't even describe what he was like, but I had to get a restraining order. Now he takes care of himself, works, pays his bills, and has a normal life. I'm happy about that, the bigger picture. Just think, where do you want him to be in 5 years and how will he get there?-Alyssa
  9. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    TinaMarie, is this something new with-him or was he always like this? Maybe you're noticing it more now because he's old enough to learn to make things.
    Do you think you should do any tests?
  10. ML

    ML Guest

    Manster is like this too. We had to stop buying certain items. Also, we recently put a lock on one cabinet in the kitchen. I believe these things have slowed him down but it is a constant battle. I even have to lock up the baking items because he too will cook or bake himself something if there are no other options. I went on lots of bike rides with him this summer too. I don't have anything new to add but wanted you to know you're sure not alone in this. Hugs, ML